Even the Daily Mail, usually the unrepentant scourge of anything left-leaning, had its doubts about the ruckus over Mil The Younger’s wreath inscription: “Cameron leaves elegant hand-written note on WW1 wreath while Ed Miliband is ridiculed for 'pathetic' and 'distasteful' scrawl - but were he and Clegg stitched up?” read the suitably revised bet-hedging headline yesterday afternoon.
Someone is still frightened of this man
There was good reason for the obedient hackery of the legendarily foul mouthed Paul Dacre to be cautious: it had emerged that the procedure followed on Remembrance Sunday, where all those laying wreaths are given time to include their own message with their tribute, was changed. Many apart from Miliband were caught out. But those who had called it wrong could not let it go.
Buffoon with trousers well alight
So who would like to start us off with a suitably petulant outburst? Step forward the odious flannelled fool Henry Cole, aged 17¾, to spin creatively: “Guardian retract their bold claim that ‘only Cameron was allowed to include a personal message on his wreath’. Goodbye conspiracy theory” he wibbled. The assertion, as with the rest of the Guardian piece, is still there. So another wrong call, then.
Pundit caught channelling his hero
Also desperately wanting everyone to look anywhere except at the facts – because they didn’t support his whining and carping at the Labour leader – was blues singer Whingeing Dan Hodges, telling “People now Tweeting me Ed Miliband was ‘set up over’ the wreath. Time to put down the wreath and move on. World’s gone mad”. Who was it who used to tell us to “move on”? Dan’s idol Tone, of course.
He's right, so I'm right too
And Hodges’ inability to forget His Master’s Voice came to the fore again, as he observed “Damian McBride, as usual, has the correct take on Wreathgate”. Yes, like Hodges, for whom nobody except Tone could ever be right on any issue, McBride is stuck in the same rut: only Pa Broon ever got anything right, and those that have succeeded him cannot hope to do the same.
Please award me some fresh cred (No. Shan't - Ed)
Meanwhile, Master Cole’s pal Alex Wickham, who sprayed so much of his credibility up the wall failing to smear Owen Jones, and latterly John Bercow, attempted to be jolly clever. “Labour rebuttal lines (1) Ed didn’t have time to write message (2) Ed wasn’t given chance to write message (3) I’m on the train”. Unfortunately, as can be seen, he failed to either restore credibility, or be clever.
Meanwhile, somewhere beyond Barking
It only remained for Louise Mensch to demand that everyone look at Herself Personally Now, as she bawled “The Guardian needs to amend its own lying and false headline and subheading. The PM was not ‘only one allowed’ he just BOTHERED TO ASK”. But she was, as usual, talking out of the back of her neck, albeit extremely stylishly [there was more, but some of us have lives].
The Tories tried to shit on Miliband. They got caught. And so did their clueless pals.