Voters Already Decided - Told You So

Last month, I concluded that, whatever dirty tricks the right-leaning part of our free and fearless press deployed in order to frighten their readers back into line and support the Tories would not work. The electorate had already made its mind up, and that meant The Blue Team was toast.

And so it came to pass: despite Labour being given a week of torrid press, most of it self-inflicted and thoroughly deserved, the Tories have just experienced a double horror show overnight, with two safe seats lost in by-elections in the constituencies of Wellingborough and Kingswood. If the swing in the former were replicated nationally, only four Tory MPs would remain.

That swing was only 0.7% short of the 1994 record set when Labour took Dudley West. It was well ahead of the swings achieved by Labour last year in Tamworth, and Selby and Ainsty. It may not have helped the Tories that their candidate was the girlfriend of disgraced former MP Peter Bone, whose departure via a recall petition was what sparked the contest.

So what were Rishi Sunak’s excuses, apart from stating the bleeding obvious - that his party is finished and on its way out? As the BBC has reported, “The prime minister says midterm by-elections for incumbent governments ‘are always difficult’ and ‘the circumstances of these by-elections were of course particularly challenging’, after Labour overturned big Tory majorities in both Kingswood and Wellingborough”. So challenging that they lost.

Any more? “But, despite Labour’s swing in Wellingborough being credited as the second largest since the second world war, Sunak says ‘very low turnout’ is to blame and results also show ‘there isn’t a huge amount of enthusiasm for the alternative in Keir Starmer and the Labour party’”. The turnout in both Wellingborough and Kingswood was not low for a by-election.

Why are voters’ minds made up well before the General Election? Simples. The Tories are pursuing fringe votes with needless culture war tactics: sending desperate refugees to Rwanda, picking on Trans people, trying to frighten the electorate against Muslims, pretending only they can sort out all the strikes that are mostly of their own making.

Rail strikes? Could have been sorted long ago, but Sunak and his pals are rail haters and don’t mind damaging the industry - they want it damaged. Doctors taking action? The Tories could have sorted that, too, but they detest the NHS and would like to see it gone, replaced by a far more expensive system of health insurance. And the voters have them sussed.

Worse, scratching the racist itch and kicking followers of The Prophet has backfired spectacularly: Reform UK, formerly the Brexit Party, has scooped up more than 10% of the vote in both Wellingborough and Kingswood. Without any obvious assistance from former Oberscheissenführer Nigel “Thirsty” Farage. The hardcore Brexiteer vote has abandoned the Tories.

The result is that Sunak and his fellow Tories are Dead Politicians Walking. Nothing they do will turn it round. Also, as former Sun editor David Yelland has noted, “Overnight results show that, not since the 1930s, has the British popular press been so out of touch with the British people. The proprietors’ agenda is not the people’s agenda”. The propaganda ain’t making it.

So the Tories are not yet down and out. But you can see it from there.

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Popular Conservatism ISN’T

Today has seen the launch of PopCon, or Popular Conservatism, a bold and indeed brave concept, given that the Tories are registering a consistent opinion poll deficit to Labour of more than 20%. Who its front man is, is not totally clear: while Liz Truss, the UK’s most useless post-war Prime Minister, appears to be fronting for it, another unpopular individual claims credit.

Back in the spotlight for one day only

That would be Mark Littlewood, head man at the IEA, an Astroturf lobby group that would rather not reveal who funds it. Littlewood, a spiv of no fixed loyalty, says it’s his show. Whatever. Ms Truss has spoken to a gathering numbered just about in three figures to tell the world that she is still around. Meanwhile, her first choice as Chancellor of the Exchequer, Kwasi Kwarteng, has done the rather more decent thing and announced he is leaving politics.

Having come close to crashing the economy less than two years ago, and then ousted as PM after just 50 days, to the great relief of all those who wished she had never been let in to 10 Downing Street in the first place, Ms Truss could have kept quiet. That would have been the sensible thing to do. But sensible and Liz Truss have a singularly transient relationship.

So what superior insights did she have to offer those attending? Get this slice of hokum: “successive Conservative leaders and Governments have discovered that a majority in the House of Commons is no longer enough to turn us away from the path of Blairite declinism”. And to that I call bullshit.

“Blairite declinism”? Is that when the NHS was decently funded? When councils were not staring bankruptcy in the face? When roads were decently maintained? When folks had a little more discretionary income, the ability to splash out on stuff once in a while without having to cut back on other spending? When Prime Ministers didn’t go round crashing the economy on the say-so of spivs and chancers in those Astroturf lobby groups?

Y’know, I rather like the sound of that there “declinism”. But let’s hear from Ms Truss herself. “Wokeism seems to be on the curriculum…there is confusion about basic biological facts, like what is a woman. Look at the net zero zealots…if you listen to the Today programme, I don’t recommend it, you’ll hear demands for more public spending”. More misuse of the word “woke”.

And look who's behind it all

As Rob Hutton noted, “So far, Popular Conservatism is pro-cigarettes, pro-Covid and pro-carbon emissions. Not clear what the party has got against voters' lungs”. Lewis Goodall added “Liz Truss says she doesn’t get invited to London dinner parties”. Perhaps it’s because she’s talking crap?

It’s the same sob story: as with the railway sell-offs, so with Ms Truss and her disastrous time in office, the refrain is consistent. If only we’d been allowed to do it properly, all would have been well. The rail transport industry, and later the whole economy, would have been utterly screwed, but it would have been achieved in accordance with the purest of orthodox economic principles.

So who was brave enough to rock up to this gathering of the irretrievably irrelevant? Beth Rigby of Sky News observed “lots of MPs here including Liz Truss, Jacob Rees Mogg, Lee Anderson, Andrea Jenkyns, Priti Patel, Wendy Morton, Alec Shelbrooke, David Jones”. Plenty of those about to be turfed out of the Commons come the next General Election.

What they heard was a combination of paranoia and ignorance: as Faisal Islam mused, “noteworthy that at PopCon ex-PM Liz Truss listed the Cameron-created Office of Budget Responsibility as one of the quangos and bureaucracies built up under Blair and ‘taken over by the left’ from which Cons haven’t done enough to ‘take the power back’”.

But what she is selling is popular, honestly. Lewis Goodall again: “Truss says Britain is full of ‘secret conservatives’ - again echoing Bennism. The voters are there really, they just have to be inspired with a true ideology”. No, Britain is full of not very secret pissed off voters who have had enough of the Tories. Ms Truss and Littlewood are deluded if they believe otherwise.

One Conservative clown car, right now, is one too many. That is all.

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Santa Drives A Tram

It’s that time of year again, when Zelo Street takes a break for the Christmas period to travel, meet, catch up, relax and recharge the batteries for the year ahead. As I’m no longer resident in the UK - something that the brains trust of trolls has yet to figure out, bless them - here’s some views of one recent tradition that happens every December across the river in Lisbon.

Ho ho ho - it's a Proper Tram™

The city’s operator of buses, elevadores and trams, Carris (pronounced Ka-Reesh) takes two Proper Trams™, as in genuine 1930s ones, and turns them into Christmas Trams, or Elétricos de Natal. A word in the ear of those thinking the tram they boarded to experience the crush on Line 28 (cos it’s in the guide book, duh) was all 1930s - those are not Proper Trams™.

Not really a Proper Tram™

Those trams you see in everyday service have been given 1990s electrical systems, trucks, motors and controllers. They have a pantograph as well as a trolley pole, and are known as Elétricos Remodelados (remodelled trams). But back to the Christmas Trams, which this year have been giving trips to school-age children, and later, families. The trips sold out. Very rapidly.

Another Proper Tram™, another Ho Ho Ho

Because of drainage works (don’t ask) this year’s trip has been from the Carris depot at Santo Amaro, west to Algés and back. The trams carry a green livery, and have Santa at the controls (honest). They were snapped passing Pastéis de Belém on the outbound leg, and with the backdrop of the Mosteiro dos Jerónimos on the return. Another word in the tourist ears.

Premium tram tour. But not really a Proper Tram™

Look at all those standing outside Pastéis de Belém, eating the Pastéis de Nata they bought from the takeaway shop. The Pastéis cost the same if you go in the café and have a sit down. The coffee is excellent. And you can freshen up with a visit to the bathroom. Also, you get the Pastéis served warm from the oven. And that’s the only way to really enjoy them.

Return trip, and more Ho Ho Ho

Another tourist tip: if you want to visit the Monastery, go early doors. Later in the morning, all the coaches rock up and the queues get horrendous. In the New Year, I may write up more tourist tips, and maybe a Lisbon craft beer guide. Plus where you should visit, and more importantly, where you should avoid, when it comes to dining out. But, once again, I digress.

Feliz Natal to one and all

Arrangements for Christmas are already being made, the menu has been circulated, transport and hotels booked, and that will be that for blogging until after the festivities. It’s wall to wall sunshine here in Pinhal Novo, so a relaxing afternoon walk beckons. Have a relaxing Christmas, shut the horror show out for a few days, and hopefully I’ll see you all on the other side.

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Susan Hall Is An Idiot

The Tories, it might be thought, would like to do well in, perhaps even win, next year’s Mayoral election in London. They have, after all, rewritten the rules to impose First Past The Post on an electorate without consulting it first, so none of that Second Preference rubbish putting Labour incumbent Sadiq Khan back in City Hall. But to do well, they need a credible candidate.

Susan Hall AM

Last time, Shaun Bailey had been written off by many, but still managed a respectable 44.8% of the final vote tally. So who would follow that? What would a sensible party selection be? What would a pragmatic and competent party have done? What would Nietzsche have done? Sadly for The Blue Team, they chose Assembly Member Susan Hall. Who she?

Ms Hall apparently had problems seeing through Combover Crybaby Donald Trump. Nor did she figure out that Whinging Dan Hodges was not always right - about anything. So when Desperate Dan sniffed “How many people are sitting in Michigan saying ‘I was going to vote Trump. But Prince Harry doesn’t like him. So now I’m voting Biden’” she added “The exact opposite I would imagine. I think Trump will win”. Trump lost. And lost Michigan, too.

On she ploughed. “And people will wonder how Trump won” … “and Democrat’s [sic] will wonder why if/when Trump wins”. Trump still lost. Come the election, she was holding fast: “In Washington beginning to look like crowds might get ugly. Doubt that Trump doing well will be accepted easily”.

But her belief in Trump was as nothing when compared to her backing for disgraced former occasional Mayor of London Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson. “Good for Boris supporting both Conservative and Labour Hillingdon Councillors against the expansion of ULEZ Sadiq Khan mustn’t do this it will make life so difficult for poorer Londoners” she told last November.

Her problem was, not for the last time, missing the obvious: Bozo was the one who started the ULEZ business in the first place, as well as becoming a stinking hypocrite when he thought it might make him look good. But at first, her poll ratings seemed to put her within reach of matching Khan’s.

Sadly, though, after ULEZ was expanded, and drivers realised that the scare stories about who would be charged to enter it were mostly untrue, those ratings changed. First it was Khan on 50% and Ms Hall on 25%, which was bad enough, and enough to get the incumbent over the line, whatever voting system was used, and however the vote split. More recently a poll has shown Sadiq Khan still on 50%, but Ms Hall down at a mere 23%.

And so it came to pass that Ms Hall’s campaign tried an attention-grabbing stunt: their candidate had been pickpocketed on the Tube! See, Sadiq’s letting crime skyrocket out of control! It’s all his fault! Sadly, two things then happened. One, her money and cards were returned to her, which means it must have been a lousy pickpocket. Or they just fell out of hers.

Also, Two, it was pointed out to her that the Tube, being one of those railway thingies, was the domain of the British Transport Police, not the Met. So crime on its premises and trains were not down to the Mayor. Perhaps she should be haranguing the Secretary of State for Transport, but, oh hang on a minute, that would be Mark Harper, and he’s in, er, the same party as her.

So did that sink in? Did it buggery. The result of It Not Sinking In was that, yesterday, Ms Hall announced “Tube crime has skyrocketed by 56% in the last year under Sadiq Khan. We must restore confidence in our public transport by making it safer. I will conduct a full review of TfL to ensure it delivers”. Sadiq Khan is still not responsible for the BTP.

Dave Hill of the excellent On London website delivered some context. “Reported Tube crime has ‘skyrocketed’ from 13.7 to 18.6 reported offences per *one million* passenger journeys. Misleading & scaremongering”. Ms Hall’s remaining supporters will no doubt go through the motions, but come the Mayoral Election, she’s going to be toast. And deservedly so.

Next year, Susan Hall will meet reality, and lose. Just rejoice at that news.

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Tory Propaganda - Voters Not Listening

With two by-election results not being declared until after the papers had published their first editions, something else had to be splashed across those front pages. No matter for the inmates of the Northcliffe House bunker, or those at the increasingly desperate and downmarket Telegraph, there was always a little Government propaganda they could use instead.

Your seat's on the line too, matey

In the case of the Mail and Tel, though, it was Israeli Government propaganda that adorned their fist editions. And thereby hangs a tale: the editorial teams of both papers ought to know already that the last time they did that, their readers failed to heed the instructions handed down. And when the by-election results finally came, it was clear the voters weren’t listening, either.

Both in Tamworth, where the appropriately named Chris Pincher had left in disgrace, and Mid-Bedfordshire, where (yes, it’s her again) Nadine Dorries had finally resigned, to the relief of many in the constituency who wished it had happened earlier, the Tories failed to defend five-figure majorities (19,600 and 24,600 respectively) and lost both seats to Labour.

The Election Maps UK feed on Twitter, X, or whatever Muskrat is calling it this week, sounded a “Just For Fun” klaxon, telling “How GB would vote if the Mid Bedfordshire By-Election swing was repeated across the country”. The Lib Dems would become the opposition with over 100 seats, Labour would be out of sight on 484 seats, and the Tories would be reduced to a rump of 20 seats.

What went wrong for the Tories? Perhaps the shorter answer would result from asking what didn’t go wrong. The Tamworth by-election followed Pincher losing his appeal against a proposed suspension from the Commons after he drunkenly groped two men. As for Mid Beds, Ms Dorries had not spoken in the Commons for more than a year prior to her resigning.

Worse, the Tories are now led by a Prime Minister so totally out of touch with ordinary voters that he uses private jets, or helicopters, to get around the country. The voters have to use their cars, or take the train (Mid Beds has a vocal commuter contingent who are well versed on the less than perfect service they can expect from Flitwick and Harlington).

Worse still, as Adam Bienkov pointed out, the Tories have not endeared themselves to voters recently: “So to summarise, the big messages from Rishi Sunak's party going into these by-elections were that: - We're scrapping our biggest levelling up project - Criminals will be spared jail - We're taking away your cigarettes - Parents struggling to feed their kids can ‘f*** off’”.

And as if The Blue Team could not make things worse, they, er, made things worse by both their losing candidates leaving the count before the winning candidates had made their acceptance speeches. If either of the losers stands for the seat next time, their opponents will have the Sour Loser acts on a tape loop. So what kind of excuses are the Tories deploying today?

“Labour got fewer votes in Mid Beds than in 2019”. Except the Tories got more than 26,000 fewer. “By-elections don’t matter”. Except they mattered when holding Uxbridge and South Ruislip. And education secretary Gillian Keegan claiming the results “did not show a swing to Labour”. Some remedial maths lessons needed there. Maybe she was arguing in her spare time.

Two people who should be ‘fessing up and saying sorry, but will not be, are party chairman Greg Hands and his deputy Lee Anderson. Instead, Hands told Sky News “the conversations I had in Mid Bedfordshire and Tamworth [show that] people were happy with the job that Rishi Sunak is doing as prime minister”. So happy they appear poised to eject him from Downing Street.

That, along with the propensity to resort to personal abuse rather too readily, is a significant part of why the Tories keep on losing. Thuggish behaviour from the likes of 30p Lee is also counting against them. Labour hardly needs to lift a finger; the Tories are doing their hard work for them. Rishi Sunak being out of the country pretending to be important is just the icing on the cake.

The Blue Team may be facing wipeout. Just rejoice at that news.

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Sunak’s Rail Haters Strike

No-one should have been surprised when the news came: the Tories, having green-lighted the HS2 project to begin construction in early 2020, began to waver last year and cut most of its eastern leg, and have now decided to believe the propaganda circulated by their pals from Tufton Street and abandon the western leg to Manchester. While at conference in Manchester.

The lack of surprise is that this is a Government of confirmed rail haters. Amateur PM Rishi Sunak travels by helicopter and private jet; Jeremy Hunt (the former Culture Secretary) arrived in Manchester by plane; Grant “Spiv” Shapps has a private plane. This convocation of mass idiocy deliberately refuse to settle outstanding industrial action to put people off rail travel.

When the late Queen was being transported back to London for her state funeral, her remains were kept well clear of the rail network, unlike what happened after the death of her father in 1952, her favourite PM Winshton in 1965, or the Royal party following the funeral of Diana, Princess of Wales, in 1997 (her remains went by road, everyone else took the Royal Train).

Also, the alphabet soup of alleged “think tanks”, in reality Astroturf lobby groups, the IEA, CPS, ASI and TPA, all hate railways, which nowadays mean public investment: this they all deem to be bad by definition. Sunak will no doubt duck and weave when anyone tries to nail him down on the abandonment; he may also talk well, but lie badly. Few will be convinced.

ITV News were first out of the traps: “The Manchester leg of HS2 has been shelved, ITV News understands, meaning the north west will no longer get a high speed rail connection to London. Rishi Sunak has decided instead to allocate billions previously ringfenced for the project to other transport projects in the north … A Number 10 spokesperson said no final decisions had been made but a Treasury spokesperson would not deny the reports”.

There was more. “The Leeds leg had already been cancelled and now all lines beyond Birmingham have been abandoned, meaning Crewe will also miss out on high speed rail. Mr Sunak … says priorities in the north west lie elsewhere”. Ran that one past Andy Burnham, did he? It gets worse.

“He is instead planning to fund the repair of Britain's road network by filling potholes and boosting connectivity between northern towns and cities with Northern Powerhouse Rail”. But Northern Powerhouse Rail depends on using spare capacity on the HS2 line between Manchester Airport and Manchester Piccadilly. Or, put another way, the Tories can’t even lie straight.

Do we have that all-important second source for this news? Sure do: Pippa Crerar of the Guardian told “Rishi Sunak set to confirm he is scrapping the Northern leg of HS2 to Manchester at the Tory party conference in the city - very tricky optics for government”. Tricky, as in he and his fellow Tory MPs getting out of the city in one piece, having screwed its future over.

James Chapman, who has worked in Government, was unimpressed. “What a dismal retreat and betrayal of the North. When I worked at the Treasury, we set up the National Infrastructure Commission to try to take the politics out of big projects like this and prevent this sort of short-termism. It didn’t work”.

Adam Bienkov of Byline Times added “So to summarise, the Government has just announced plans to scrap the biggest public transport infrastructure project planned for any Northern city, while taking part in its conference in that same city, which its Chancellor chose to travel to by plane”. While said Chancellor, and his PM, moaned about rail strikes they provoked.

And Simon Kendler cautioned “There you go … Stupid decision by stupid people … And don’t be fooled. There’ll be no re-allocation of funds … You can’t reallocate money that doesn’t exist … This will just cost us more, manyfold, for years to come”. But they’ll be celebrating in Tufton Street, cos after all, it’s only a game, they won, and the rotten leftie provincials lost.

The rest of Europe gets on with high speed, and upgraded, rail links. But the Tories are so much cleverer than that. Which is why the UK is screwed.

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HS2 And The Right Wing Idiocy

Someone not unadjacent to amateur Prime Minister Rishi Sunak has been briefing our free and fearless press that he is going to axe the Manchester to Birmingham part of the HS2 project, having already ditched the East Midlands to Leeds part of it. This would be a move of incalculable stupidity, and as such it has the unyielding support of the Tories’ cheerleaders out on the right.

Even disgraced former occasional Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson has warned against further cuts to HS2: Bozo took many less than optimal decisions when Mayor of London; refusing to cancel Crossrail was not one of them. Even he can see that cutting HS2 further would fail to deliver network capacity improvements, and be totally counterproductive.

But out there on the right, the slew of Astroturf lobby groups whispering into the ear of gullible politicians - and they don’t come much more gullible than Sunak - keep on telling the PM that the project is somehow “unaffordable”, with the result that the Tories are briefing the economically illiterate excuse that proceeding with HS2 would leave “no money for anything else”.

Leaving aside for a moment John Maynard Keynes’ observation that “anything we can actually do we can afford”, something that is especially true when a Government is in charge of its own currency, it is high time that the economic, factual and technical illiteracy of the anti-HS2 cabal were analysed and exposed. Because this convocation of illiteracy is what informs Sunak.

We could see the convocation hard at work in the activities of the TPA, IEA and ASI (see Zelo Street passim). We can see it in the obedient recycling of the “no money for anything else” idiocy by those at the increasingly desperate and downmarket Telegraph today. And we can see it in the Tel’s support act, the punditry of the increasingly alt-right Spectator magazine.

Those who look in regularly on Zelo Street may recall a historically, technically and indeed factually illiterate offering from one Ross Clark trailed with the claim “There is a far better option than HS2 - and it already exists”. Clark had become fixated on the long-closed Great Central main line.

So what was his schtick? This is a selection of what Clark has written, with my corrections. “The alternative is the little-known Great Central Railway [it’s known to everyone in the rail industry, because know-nothing hacks are forever citing it as an HS2 alternative]. This ready-made high speed line [it was engineered for 75mph] takes almost exactly the same route between London and the Midlands as HS2 would [no it doesn’t].” There is more.

Rather a lot more. “It sits there, its viaducts and bridges unused [by ‘unused’, he means ‘demolished’], begging for trains [no. Just no] … It was built with the vision of operating 125mph expresses [no railway designed in the 19th Century was thus built], and used a ‘continental loading gauge’ [debatable] - which means that, uniquely for British lines, the wider trains used in mainland Europe could be run along it [no they couldn’t. Not a chance]”.

And it got worse. “The Great Central was one of the many casualties of the Beeching closures of the 1960s [mainly wrong - the run down of the GC began in 1958, five years before the Beeching Report], yet it remains almost totally intact [totally wrong]. A few agricultural buildings have been built across it, but otherwise its line remains clear [by ‘A few agricultural buildings’ he means ‘most of Nottingham city centre’]”. Illiterate is putting it mildly.

Now, Clark is back, and the level of ignorance is off the scale. He talks of “the link between Manchester and the North West Coast mainline”. Who is this “North West Coast mainline”? If he means the West Coast Main Line, perhaps he should say so. He is also shaky on when HS2 started.

“By the time that Johnson approved the project in early 2020”. Let’s consult the Wiki entry. “In January 2012, the Secretary of State for Transport announced that HS2 would go ahead in two phases”. Perhaps Clark means “Construction on the line began in 2020”, but that is not the same thing. And then he digs up the Great Central again. Sort of.

“Between London and Rugby the project could have used the existing, disused trackbed of the Grand Central line, the last of the great trunk routes to be built at the turn of the 20th century, but which fell victim to the Beeching cuts”. Who is this “Grand Central line”? And on that note, I have questions.

One, how do you get from Rugby into Birmingham along a double track line which is already at capacity? Two, how do you get from the Great Central into London, other than using London Underground’s Metropolitan Line (no way), or the Chiltern Line, which is, once more, already at capacity?

Because that is how the GC got into London. But enough: this is the kind of idiocy informing the Government. It’s the kind of idiocy that brought us Brexit. The idiocy that says the UK should leave the ECHR. The idiocy that feeds culture wars and all the hate that comes with them. The idiocy that treats everything as some kind of jolly game. The idiocy that is trashing the country.

And if Sunak listens to the idiocy again, it will trash the country a little more.

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Train Tickets - Politics And Rackets

In the UK, there is an almost constant and often heated debate on how much it costs to travel by train, especially over longer distances. Those asserting that companies operating trains over the National Rail Network are ripping off customers frequently cite other countries, where demand management has not been taken to such lengths as in Britain. But they miss something.

A southbound Intercidades, of Corail coaches, calls at Entroncamento

It’s not just the ticket costs, but also the captive market for items like railcards: seniors and young people who travel at all regularly have to buy these just to get a third off full price tickets. And I have to tell you all in the UK that this is a racket. Moreover, tickets do not have to cost so much: this is, as I point out so often, a political decision. Other countries’ politics bring different results.

So let’s bring all of this together: next week I have to visit the city of Coimbra. This involves, in units Brits will recognise, a journey of just over 130 miles from Lisboa Oriente (north east of the city centre) to Coimbra-B (on the western fringe of the city). As a comparison, I fed the same dates and times into the National Rail journey planner for London to Bristol.

Travel both ways will be by Intercidades (Inter City) trains. These are what your average rail enthusiast will recognise as a Proper Train™, having a locomotive at the head, and a rake of coaches. They are not Portugal’s fastest trains - the tilting Alfa Pendular is quicker, and is also more expensive - but they make rapid enough progress, and offer a decent travelling environment. I decided to travel in the comfier end of the train.

So that’s First Class, Lisboa Oriente to Coimbra-B and back. 130 miles each way. Ticket bought on Friday 8th September for outward travel Thursday 14th, and return Saturday 16th. What is that going to cost?

It’s going to cost €26. 26 Euro. Not much more than £22.

There must, you will think, be a catch. OK, there is one factor I should mention: it’s half price, because I’m an Old Fart™. So double that amount to €52, or around £45. Now look at the National Rail journey planner for London to Bristol off peak - that will be £46.95 (with a railcard). Standard Class, or what is still called Second Class in Portugal. How much for First Class, then?

Faro to Lisboa Oriente Intercidades, made up of older coaches, arrives at Pinhal Novo

The website helpfully lets you know “First Class from £91.70”. HOW MUCH? Might just pass on that, thanks. And it gets worse: London Paddington to Bristol Temple Meads is around 15 miles less than Lisboa Oriente to Coimbra-B. It still costs more, with a railcard, to do the former and sit in the cheap seats, than it does to pay full whack for the latter and go first class.

And then we get to railcards. They are, once more, a racket. Another way of raising a bit more cash. Another of those political choices. Why so? Simples. You don’t need anything like that to get Old Fart™ discount in Portugal: you just show a photo ID, which you will also have to show to the conductor or ticket inspector as required. No additional cost involved. No racket.

Yes, there are differences: in the UK, an off peak ticket allows break of journey and the ability to just get on the next train, or not. Inter City trains in Portugal are booked to be journey and seat specific: you have to decide which train you want to travel on beforehand. In the UK, you can get on a busy train and stand all the way; in Portugal, when the seats are sold out, that’s it. No more tickets sold. Same in Spain. Same in France.

Maybe the trains aren’t up to the kind of standard you might expect in the UK? Er, no: the trains I’m travelling on use coaches similar to the French Corail design, built under licence in the mid 1980s and using stainless steel construction under licence from the Budd Company. The French originals are mainly still in service across France, especially where there is no TGV.

Some Intercidades, like Faro to Lisbon, use older coaches, with interiors similar to the Corails. All have air con. These trains are also popular with visitors because the fares are low and the travelling environment is OK. Once again: fare levels in the UK are a political choice, and railcards are a racket.

Here endeth the lesson from southern Europe. Have a good trip.

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Electric Cars, Bungs, And Reality

Over-hyped, over-subsidised and perhaps over here, much has been made of the decision by Tata Group to build a new electric vehicle battery plant on the Gravity Business Park near Bridgwater in Somerset, a site close to the M5. Our brave, adventurous and not desperate at all, honestly, Government has secured the investment. But this has come at a considerable price.

Sites for battery plants - Gravity business park near Bridgwater ...

As the BBC reported at the time, “In the case of Tata's new plant, the UK's expected success has not been easily or cheaply won … The government has said that while it does not recognise a figure of £500m in reported subsidies, they concede that it is in the hundreds of millions of pounds”.

Do go on. “This would take the form of cash grants, energy subsidies and other training and research funding … India’s Tata has extensive steel interests in the UK including the Port Talbot plant in South Wales and the government will also offer around £300m to subsidise, upgrade, and decarbonise those operations … Along with additional energy discounts, it will bring the total incentive package to Tata close to £800m”. Ker-Ching!

There was more. “Government sources conceded that while the two investments will not be announced at the same time, the two projects are linked … Although the price tag will be seen as high, the UK is reluctantly involved in an international subsidy war which has been dramatically escalated by the US Inflation Reduction Act”. And what of the EU?

“The EU is preparing its own package in response … the UK … currently only has one [battery] plant in operation next to Nissan's Sunderland factory, and one barely on the drawing board in Northumberland … By contrast the EU has 35 plants open, under construction or planned”. Like where, perchance?

Like Sines (pronounced “Sin-esh”), which is situated on Portugal’s Alentejo coast. Apart from being the town where Vasco da Gama was christened, Sines hosts sandy beaches, a fishing harbour, and is an important port town, so important that the new Évora to Elvas rail line has been built partly to enable better transport access between Sines and Spain.

... versus the Port of Sines

It is also the site chosen by China Aviation Lithium Battery Technology, or CALB, for its new electric vehicle battery plant, which is scheduled to be in production by 2025 … “with the objective of answering the company’s current order backlog on the European continent. It should be the biggest CALB factory in Europe … The manufacturer estimates that the Sines factory has the potential to ‘represent circa 4% of the Portuguese GDP’”.

More importantly, and just to put the Tata Group bung in perspective, “China Aviation Lithium Battery Technology (CALB), which will be producing lithium batteries in Sines, hailed the deal signed between the automotive manufacturers Xpeng and Volkswagen, considering it ‘an opportunity’ for the battery maker”. And why should this be significant?

Here’s why. “CALB, which is part of the top 5 largest constructors in the world for electric vehicle batteries, is the main supplier of Xpeng … On July 27th, Volkswagen announced the acquisition of a 4.99% share in the Chinese Xpeng brand for 630 million euros for the joint development of electric vehicles”. What will the joint development involve, exactly?

“The document indicated that the brands will be developing two electric models together for the Chinese market, which should begin production in 2026”. Volkswagen Group already has a manufacturing site not far from Sines - VW Autoeuropa, which currently produces the T-Roc, is located at Penalva, in the Palmela district. It is, like the port of Sines, rail connected.

Is the Tata Group plant going to gain this distinction, or will the Tories extend their growing reputation as rail-haters which already has the apparently timeless strike actions to its credit (debit?), actions that could have been settled at rather lower cost than “toughing it out” will involve?

The Tories are handing out bungs. The rest of Europe gets on with business.

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Visit Lisbon - But Maybe Not Next Week

While the UK’s press continues to sink deeper into its self-imposed trough of self-pity, serving up a diet of stale culture wars, hatred of those who have incurred its displeasure, and denial of reality, especially including climate change, the rest of Europe moves on. Which at this time of the year means getting in the visitors to spend money. Portugal is rather good at that.

So much so that one recent estimate showed that tourism will account for just over 21% of the country’s GDP this year, something which the country’s rail operators, and those in Spain, France and elsewhere, might usefully consider the next time they trot out the lame excuses for not offering any direct trains between Portugal and the rest of Europe (more or less, folks).

But, as the late Clive James might have said, I digress. You should still visit the country, and especially Lisbon, just not next week, because the visitor event to end all visitor events is upon us. Hotels, Air B+Bs, campsites, forget it. There will be Very Little Accommodation anywhere in the Greater Lisbon Metropolitan Area until after next weekend. Because of JMJ. Or WYD.

What that? Jornada Mundial da Juventude, or in English, World Youth Day, is a Catholic festival which will attract pilgrims in their hundreds of thousands. Estimates put the total attending the final event, hosted by Pope Francis, at as many as one million. Yes, as Chief Inspector Clouseau of the Sureté might have observed, even the Purp will be there. He flies in next Wednesday.

Some of the numbers are mind-boggling: events begin on August 1st and end on the 6th. On Thursday 2nd, “The afternoon will see the ‘major meeting’ - at 5.45pm in Parque Eduardo VII, baptised the Colina do Encontro (Hill of Encounter) for the event, to which at least 400,000 if not more pilgrims are expected”. Four hundred thousand. And the next day will bring more.

“750,000 pilgrims are expected to arrive, throughout the day, to Parque Eduardo VII for what is called the Via Sacra. This is a moment where pilgrims will be received by the Pope from 6pm … from the arrival of the Pope, this holy communion will begin, with processions arriving and many Catholics lining up for the reported million communion wafers made for the event”.

Small wonder that so many residents have decided to decamp to the Algarve, the Alentejo, the Silver Coast, the Douro Valley, anywhere that gets them away from what is going to be one heck of a crush in central Lisbon (the Parque Eduardo VII, named for the British Edward VII, overlooks the Avenida de Liberdade, and from there the old downtown).

So to the weekend. “Saturday is billed as being ‘the longest day, with most journeys for the Pope’ He is due to give two speeches, one in the morning in Fátima - to which he will travel in a military helicopter, and where he is due to pray with young people who are ill and some who are prisoners. It is here too that His Holiness is expected to say a prayer for peace in Ukraine”.

After that? “Then it will be back to Lisbon, first for a private meeting with members of the Companhia de Jesus, and finally to the Parque Tejo-Trancão - the slice of riverside shared by Lisbon and Loures municipalities where as many as one million pilgrims could be waiting for him”. Do go on.

“This is where the ‘inscribed pilgrims’ will benefit over those that simply decided to turn up without informing organisers: inscribed pilgrims will have a place in the park (dubbed Field of Grace, for World Youth Day) closer to the spectacular altar-stage than the non-inscribed. There will be gigantic screens erected over the 100 hectares, for everyone to at least get a view of what is happening, even if they are a long way away from where it is going on”.

Any more? Sure is. “Finally, on the Sunday (August 6), the Pope’s final public appearance will come at 4.30pm, after the official closure of World Youth Day, where he is expected to give a speech of thanks in Algés, Oeiras, to the 30,000 volunteers who contributed to the event (even paying for the privilege)”. The volunteers, in their yellow T-Shirts, have been a presence for some days now around the city. Now will come all those pilgrims.

For those saying “Yeah, but what about what went on in Portugal’s Catholic church for so many years?” there is this coda: “there will be a lot of ‘spare time’ in the pontiff’s schedule, but that it is almost certain that some of this will be spent in meetings with victims of sexual abuse within the Catholic Church”.

There is also this upmarket thought: “If all goes according to plan, this will be an exceptional PR event for Lisbon, which is already one of the most popular European destinations on many scores. Mayor Carlos Moedas has stressed the return for the capital in terms of revenue from visitors will be worth every cêntimo spent on the planning and infrastructures, most of which will remain in place for use by local people”. It’ll just be heaving busy, that’s all.

Visit Lisbon - but wait until after the big event has run its course.

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So Farewell Then Brexit Britain

Why had the blog posts dried up? What was occupying so much of my time that it had to take precedence over all else? What was so important that it involved travel, meetings, form filling, lawyers, notaries, estate agents, removal firms, energy suppliers and engineers, a lot of visits from online furniture and electrical goods outlets, and lots of hotel stays?

Pinhal Novo - the bandstand ...

Well, as you will see from my Twitter bio (X or no X, that is the question), the short answer is that I have left the UK, and almost certainly for good. A country that is slowly, but perhaps irretrievably, on its way down the pan and into international irrelevance, the result of bad faith actors who thought Brexit was just a jolly game. So last year I decided to go. To Portugal.

Along the way there have been meetings with the folks who progress residence permits, which took me to Edinburgh in February and then a follow-up interview in June at the Serviço de Estrangeiros e Fronteiras in the town of Viana do Castelo (the thought occurred that this was more an initiative test, as most Brits wouldn’t know where it was, or how to get there).

There was a lawyer providing a proxy so I could obtain a NIF (you can’t do much in Portugal without a NIF, folks), an estate agency person who accompanied me to the bank to get an account, a notary who oversaw the purchase of an apartment, an engineer who reconnected the gas supply (don’t ask), and a removal firm to take stuff from Crewe to Pinhal Novo.

Where that? Pinhal Novo, which literally translates as “New Pine Forest”, is on the south side of the Tejo. Like Crewe, you can get to lots of other places from there. Lisbon is half an hour to 40 minutes away by rail or express bus. It is a low rise town and growing at some rate (if you arrive by rail on the Fertagus service, the first signs of Pinhal Novo are the cranes).

... and nearby church

So will the blog continue? For now, yes, but not for ever. Will I be writing about the fun and games involved in moving from the UK to Portugal? A strong possibility. Will there be some stuff on the country’s politics? Could be, especially given the tendency of bad faith UK politicians, like former Brexit Party Oberscheissenführer Nigel “Thirsty” Farage, to lie about them.

Do they have inflation in Portugal? Yes, but it’s on its way down, with food inflation now below the all-important 10%? Do they have strikes? Ho yus. Do they have The Fash? Yes, a bad Trump tribute act headed by a gobshite called André Ventura. He’s got a twitchy right arm and an acute sense of victimhood. But they also have influence. Because they’re in the EU.

Why make the announcement now? Simples. Today I got my hands on a residence permit, from those nice people at the SEF in Viana do Castelo, an increasingly popular tourism destination which closes on Sundays (this is not so much of an exaggeration). That makes it official. So it’s hello to warmer and drier weather (no rain for a month and a half). And farewell to Crewe.

There may be visits to the UK. But it is no longer home. I’m aware that this can be a lose-lose in the eyes of paranoid Brexiteers: on the one hand, you are told “If you don’t like it, why don’t you go”, and when you take the advice and go, they bawl “TRAITAH” in your general direction. Well, up theirs.

So, finally, farewell, and thanks for all the fish. I may be celebrating later.

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Ticket Offices And Reality

And so we move on to the latest battleground where the Government will attempt to win over a sceptical electorate by deploying selectively presented propaganda, amplified by our free and fearless press without their remaining so-called journalists bothering to check, and with only a few voices from the Trades Union movement, plus industry experts, in opposition.

Will there still be a ticket office here?

As the BBC has reported, “Train firms plan mass closures of ticket offices”. Do go on. “Train companies are pressing ahead with plans to close hundreds of station ticket offices across England over the next three years … Under the proposals, some ticket kiosks would remain in large stations, but elsewhere staff will be on concourses to sell tickets”. But don’t worry. Because.

“A 21-day public consultation has been launched to collect passengers' views”. There was more. “Posters have gone up in stations, inviting the public to take part, after which the government will make the final decision on which offices will close. Currently around three out of every five stations has a ticket office, although some are only staffed part time”. Meaning what?

Meaning those stations typically offer ticket office service from around 0600 hours to somewhere between 1230 and 1430 hours. Those ticket offices may open on Saturdays, but will almost certainly remain closed on Sundays. Moreover, stations that offer that level of service do not have any other station staff. So there won’t be anyone else “on concourses to sell tickets”.

And what of those mythical “24 hour ticket counters”? The ones described by Tom Harwood of Gammon Broadcasting™ News (“Bacon’s News Channel”) thus: “there are some ticket booths around the country that sell about one ticket a week … These need to be manned all the time”. There are no “24 hour ticket counters”. Not one. Not even in London. Not anywhere in the UK.

We know this as the Nationalrail website has the details under “Stations”. So, by way of an example, let’s start at Crewe, as it’s a very good place to start. The ticket office is NOT open 24 hours. It opens before 0600 hours (just after 0800 hours on Sundays) and closes at 2000 hours (1900 hours at weekends). But there are staff on the barriers and platforms.

Typically, platform staff are there to dispatch trains. But take a trip on four of the six lines taking you away from Crewe, and the story is very different. Let’s go towards Liverpool. Winsford and Hartford have ticket offices but they close early afternoon. There are no other station staff: trains self dispatch. Go further, to Acton Bridge, and there are no station staff at all.

Will there be one here?

How about towards Manchester? Sandbach and Holmes Chapel have ticket offices that close early afternoon. They are closed on Sundays, which is often a very busy time for travel. Go further: Goostrey and Chelford are unstaffed. Trains self dispatch. The first station that has ticket office service into the afternoon, and platform staff, is Wilmslow. And towards Stoke on Trent?

Kidsgrove has a ticket office open during the mornings, but again, not on Sunday. Alsager and Longport are unstaffed. Go towards Shrewsbury and there are no station staff, no ticket offices, nothing. But there are six intermediate stations. Only going towards Chester or Stafford is the first stop a station with both ticket office and platform staff.

So the idea that there are all these stations with superfluous ticket offices, along with station staff with nothing else to do, is just more right-wing claptrap. The railway has already modernised, indeed, this is a process that has been in train for decades, with reductions in station staff coming hard on the heels of the Beeching Report and the subsequent closures.

The Guardian’s take is “Almost 1,000 offices are believed to be targeted for closure under government proposals to cut costs and ‘modernise’ the railway, although ministers have for months shied away from spelling out the extent of the plans, in the face of concern from their own MPs as well as unions and passenger groups”. And remember the view from Crewe.

All those ticket offices would be part of the closure: maybe even Crewe, Chester, Stafford, Wilmslow, Shrewsbury and other major stations. Then remember how intimidating the labyrinthine ticketing system of Britain’s railways can seem to first time users. The station ticket office welcomes the uninitiated. It eases their journey. Its presence encourages repeat travel.

Remember also that the RMT has warned “A process to shut nearly all of Britain’s railway station ticket offices could begin as early as next week”. A process that will be cheered on by the right-wing press, who either don’t travel by train, or when they do, ticket purchase is one of those occasions when they have chaps to do that sort of thing for them.

The Tories will misinform. Their press pals will lie. The public will suffer. Again.

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Nigel Farage Is Leaving The Country

So certain was he that Brexit would be a runaway success, former Brexit Party Oberscheissenführer Nigel “Thirsty” Farage made clear that, in the event of Brexit failing, he would be a runaway himself. He would leave the country, no doubt to the great relief of all those who wished it had happened rather earlier. He was equally certain he would not need to deliver on this.

But that was then, and this is now: yesterday evening, removed from the comfort zone of his bully pulpit on Gammon Broadcasting™ News (“Bacon’s News Channel”), and placed before the inquisition of Victoria Derbyshire, presenting BBC Newsnight, Farage floundered. She reeled off the bad news; he initially batted it back with the usual comment that Someone Else Done It.

This talk will evoke hollow laughter from many who witnessed the 1990s shitshow that was rail sell-off - and its aftermath. Farage blamed the bad news on others? Like all those who said that if the railways had been sold off properly, for which read irretrievably fouled up, rather than only badly fouled up but just about recoverable, all would have been well. No it wouldn’t.

But Ms Derbyshire’s persistence eventually ground down the Farage façade, and then came the admission: “Brexit has failed”. Which provoked this response from LBC host James O’Brien: “The most grimly stubborn skidmark on the underpants of British politics. I know you can’t believe a word he says but he promised to leave the country in the event of Brexit failing”.

So, as Jon Stewart might have said, two things here. One, when’s he going, and where (Mr Thirsty is rumoured to already own property in at least one EU Member State), and Two, when are we going to see the rest of the Brexiteer punditerati follow suit, preferably followed by them apologising to the millions of Britons whose lives have become impoverished due to their antics?

After all, as Ms Derbyshire told Nige, “The UK economy is the only G7 economy not back to its pre-pandemic size … business investment has lagged behind comparable economies … economically, the UK would have been better staying in, wouldn’t it?” Come on Nige! “We haven’t benefited economically from Brexit, when we could have done”. This is bullshit.

What has happened since the UK’s departure from the EU, is continuing to happen, and will keep on happening in future, is the result of the UK effectively imposing economic sanctions on itself. There were no benefits to be had from Brexit; all was told over and over again before the 2016 referendum and dismissed by the Brexiteer fringe as “Project Fear”.

Farage did, along with the massed ranks of pundits and lobbyists typified by those who proudly gathered together at Brown’s Hotel in London’s Mayfair on the eve of “Brexit Day” to celebrate their achievement in conspiring to lie to the electorate in order to, as they saw it, see off their opponents and therefore win the game. So they helped screw up their own country? No big deal.

No, I’m not suggesting that any or all of them are forcibly impoverished so they can experience first hand what their actions have forced on millions of their fellow citizens, or subjected to any punishment over and above general ridicule and public contempt. But it would be doing the decent thing to say sorry. Although they won’t. Because none of them gives a damn.

Farage has admitted it was a failure, so what of those who gathered together that evening at Brown’s Hotel? Like Julia Hartley Dooda, breakfast show host at Murdoch noise floor occupant TalkTV? What’s she said about Farage’s admission? Nothing. Not a sausage. Bugger all. Too busy stoking the boilers of the sham culture war. And she is hardly an isolated example.

The odious flannelled fool Master Harry Cole, still pretending to be a real journalist, has also somehow missed Nige’s admission. And what of Cole’s old boss, the perpetually thirsty Paul Staines? One perusal of the Guido Fawkes blog answers that one: no comment. This blog did not call them The New Guilty Men And Women for nothing. Farage owned up. They won’t.

Because it’s always someone else’s fault. No change there, then.

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Rishi Sunak - The Invisible Man

A bank holiday today has become the calm before the storm: as workers return to their offices, warehouses, factories, shops and hospitality outlets starting tomorrow, so the return of strikes. This week will bring rail strikes, which will happen in one form or another every day from Tuesday to Saturday. There will no doubt be more later in the month.

Because the Government has effectively decided to sit it out and force those striking back to work as their union funds dry up. But the Tories have misread the public mood badly. Also, the rail strikes are the mere tip of a very large iceberg, with ballots taking place for firefighters to join healthcare workers in the NHS, border force officers, teachers and many others in downing tools.

That is before one considers the current crisis in the NHS, and especially in A&E departments across the UK, the cost of living crisis, steepling energy prices, and the slow puncture to the economy that is Brexit. So, once again, it is time to dust off J K Galbraith’s definition of leadership.

“All of the great leaders have had one characteristic in common: it was the willingness to confront unequivocally the major anxiety of their people in their time. This, and not much else, is the essence of leadership”. That major anxiety, or rather those major anxieties, are clear: healthcare, and the cost of living. Who should be providing that leadership? Ah well.

The leadership should come from the top, and that means one person: the Prime Minister, Rishi Sunak. So where is he? Anyone actually seen him out and about recently? Paging Rishi Sunak! But, apart from the slickly produced videos and other messages, all that comes back is the sound of crickets.

That there is a leadership vacuum is all too obvious from one look at today’s offerings from our free and fearless press: the estimate that A&E delays could be causing 500 patient deaths a week is widely reported, and the Mail is trying to talk up Sunak, telling “The scale of the exceptional New Year challenges facing Rishi Sunak was laid bare last night”.

But what neither the Mail, nor all those titles putting the “500 patient deaths” figure on their front pages, are telling is that Sunak is thus far apparently doing very little about it, save to admit that 2023 will “have its challenges”. Well, have I got news for Rishi: you’re not there to tell the voters how challenging things are getting - you’re supposed to be doing what you can to deal with those challenges. Confronting those major anxieties.

And the right-leaning part of the press knows that their chosen Prime Minister is absent from the field of battle. Hence many of them wheeling out Prince Harry to provide a little momentary interest; indeed, the Murdoch Sun has made speculation about what is in Haz’ new book, available next week at all good bookstores, its sole front page story. Look over there, proles!

Sunak could announce more resources for the NHS, and especially those A&E units, many of which are now effectively in crisis. But he has not, and most likely will not. He goes private. So do most of his pals. So do all those obscenely overpaid editors and pundits who help prop up the Government. For him, the world is excellent. He’s a Tory, and Tories don’t care.

It’s a similar story with strikes: the rich can summon up taxis, chauffeurs, and for longer journeys, jet charters. Their position at the nexus of power and money allows them to avoid the strikes, skip the queues. But with the i Paper reminding the Tories that their own voters blame them for the NHS crisis, one might think that Sunak would at least break cover and show leadership.

But he won’t, and come the next General Election, despite the mess over which he is presiding, most of the press will slavishly back him and his fellow Tories, no matter how unfit for public office they have shown themselves to be. Rishi Sunak is the new Invisible Man: he will not intervene, he will not address the major anxiety of his people in his time.

The country is leaderless. And no-one in power appears to care. Bad news.

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Mick Lynch And Sun Hypocrisy

Strike action in pursuit of pay that enables workers to put food on the table and heat their homes has been joined by more and more of those workers, and has, in the case of the rail industry, been intensified to the extent that today sees a second consecutive day of strikes, with two more days of them on Friday and Saturday. There will be more over Christmas.

Rich people are being inconvenienced AND IT'S NOT FAIR!

Support for the rail strikes does not appear to be waning: indeed, after the Government was exposed as working behind the scenes to stop improved pay deals being put to workers’ representatives and attempting to impose unworkable conditions as part of any deal, the mood among those taking action appears to be hardening. But for some, this cannot be admitted.

Which brings us to the machinations of our free and fearless press, and more specifically that part of it controlled by foreign billionaire Rupert Murdoch. Here, the obedient inmates of the Baby Shard bunker have finally cracked under the inconvenience they have suffered as a result of RMT members striking, and have launched a barrage of spite at that union’s leader.

“Mad RMT Mick Piles On Misery … He pockets £84k-a-year plus perks … BUT he’s losing public sympathy … He’s losing his members £5,000 … He’s losing our economy billions … He’s even losing his own rag … YOU’VE LOST IT LYNCH” howls the headline, the supporting rant being co-authored by the paper’s alleged political editor, the odious flannelled fool Master Harry Cole.

Behold the cream of the press establishment

What colour is the pot, kettle Cole? Even though he wouldn’t recognise decent journalism if it jumped up in front of him and fly-hacked him in the undercarriage, Master Cole is not going to be trousering anything as trivial as £84k. He’ll be well into the six-figure bracket. And the rest is speculation and mere invention (Lynch didn’t lose his rag, except in Sun hacks’ imagination).

But let’s hear what the former alumnus of the perpetually thirsty Paul Staines at the Guido Fawkes blog has to tell his unfortunate readers. “MILITANT [scary leftie word? Check!] Mick Lynch lost his cool ­yesterday [lying] as it emerged rail workers are losing up to £5,000 pay [a figure which includes the number Zero] for his strikes [no. Strikes voted for by RMT members]”.

Do go on. “The £84,000-a-year union chief brought Britain’s trains to a halt [no he didn’t. His members voted to strike] amid plummeting support from the public [lying. The BBC reports support for rail strikes is unchanged in the past fortnight] and RMT members [no citation, nor will there be] for the Christmas chaos costing the economy billions [no citation. No investigative journalism]”.

Mick Lynch - demonised for doing his job

We are shown an image captioned “Walkouts will continue on Friday and Saturday, with two more 48-hour strikes in January”. But the trains in that photo are not part of any active fleet: they are stock that has been withdrawn from service and stored (the pairs of InterCity125 power cars at the right of the image are the dead giveaway). Usual Sun attention to detail, then.

But Master Cole is not finished yet. “Rishi Sunak told [he’s not in a position to instruct Lynch] Mad [mental health smear? Check!] Mick - who lost it twice live on air [lying] - to cancel the walkouts and not ruin Christmas. As offices parties [sic] were scrapped, and bars and pubs left empty, the RMT hardliner [demonisation? Check!] was urged by the PM not to ruin ‘a ­precious time for all of us’”. Sun hacks are being inconvenienced! This is serious!!

Have another go. “Rishi Sunak also urged Mr Lynch and his mob [demonisation? Check!] to ‘think carefully about their next steps’ … And he turned the screw [no. Just no] by noting support among members declined significantly compared to May’s first vote for strike action [see above]”.

Settling the action will not move these trains. They have been withdrawn from service

It’s good of Master Cole and his pals to let us know that they are suffering inconvenience as a result of strike action. But the obscenely overpaid propagandists of the Murdoch mafiosi show that they do not care about those struggling to put food on the table, or heat their homes during the current cold snap. They only care because they got inconvenienced.

Otherwise, they couldn’t give a stuff about those less well off then themselves. Today’s Sun front page is typical of the establishment class telling workers - you know, those who actually contribute to the economy - to know their place and do the bidding of the Government in which the Murdoch droids have invested the last dregs of their credibility.

The press doesn’t care about actual workers. But you knew that already.

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