Some commentators learn over time not to speak too soon, for fear of cursing someone: legendary voice of motor racing Murray Walker very deliberately caveated his words to tell viewers that whoever led the race he was covering was “On his last, and potentially victorious lap”, such were the number of times he said someone would win, only for them to suffer an end-of-race mishap. If only others were equally willing to learn.
(c) Doc Hackenbush 2014
One who is never going to learn willingly is (thankfully) former Tory MP Louise Mensch, who has cursed almost all those who aspired to lead the Tory Party when Young Dave threw in the towel after losing his ill-thought-through referendum on Britain’s membership of the EU. She called it wrong at every turn, sometimes hilariously so.
Less than a fortnight ago, she was clear: “It's not going to be Theresa May, there is no chance”. WRONG. Try again. Two days later came “I said Leadsom was my bet for PM and would be a great one. I have a slight preference for Michael”. WRONG. Cursed them both. Could it get any worse? It certainly could.
“Yep it will be Gove or Leadsom I hope I'd like to see them and Crabb combine #nowaymay”. WRONG. Three curses in one! And shilling for Stephen Crabb, who like Theresa May had favoured Remain. Still, onwards and, er, onwards, eh? “#Gove2016 #GoveForPM #NoWayMay”. WRONG. Guess who was next to be knocked out.
Even last Thursday, she was pushing back against the inevitable: “a secret meeting with Richard Branson, a man on record as wanting to overturn #Brexit? #NoWayMay … No we are not going to back Theresa Remain, favoured by Ken Clarke, Anna Soubry and Richard Branson #BoycottVirgin #NoWayMay #Leadsom”. Nothing personal against Ms May of course, and once again, she was plain flat WRONG.
But then came the morning’s news that Ms Leadsom was to quit her campaign. Ms Mensch was aghast: “I surely cannot blame @andrealeadsom who would want to be in such a dirty race? Michael Gove has much to answer for”. YOU JUST BACKED HIM FOR PM. But there was more: “What a gracious statement. The opposite of the thugs who smeared her. I'm so proud of @andrealeadsom”. So says the thug who defamed Piers Morgan twice and then chickened out of repeating it outside Parliament.
And there was time to get it wrong one more time: “Theresa May will have to Brexit or face a leadership challenge from MPs I am not worried there”. WRONG. There won’t be any challenge in the foreseeable future. Have a last go: “It is good that Theresa May is upsetting a lot of Remainers on my feed. After a foul campaign that's grand to see”. YOU SPENT THE LAST FORTNIGHT SLAGGING HER OFF.
The only question now is, has Ms Mensch cursed Theresa May as well? She surely cursed Gove, Crabb and Ms Leadsom. Everyone she endorses loses. It’s the support that every sensible candidate avoids like the plague. And remember, they let her become an MP.