The Government is still a shambles. Theresa May has been hosting French President Emmanuel Macron, laying on the welcome, even managing a few words of French, only for him to tell her the bad news - there will be no Brexit deal which includes our financial services sector without membership of the Single Market, adherence to EU laws, and of course being overseen by the European Court of Justice.
That’s not going to please the PM’s rabid Europhobes. So how could attention be diverted from yet another glorious failure? Simples. All that was needed was for London’s formerly very occasional Mayor Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson to assume the role previously allocated to Michael Fallon, and slap a dead cat on the table. This he did.
Iain Martin, master civil engineer. Or maybe not
Bozza’s bonzer idea was to propose a bridge across the Channel. Yes, there won’t be any dosh for the NHS - let alone £350 million - but the clown in the Foreign Office is still able to suggest another ridiculous vanity project. The Boris Bridge was instantly ridiculed, and called out for the obvious diversionary dead cat ploy. But one pundit was impressed.
Murdoch shilling taker Iain Martin was having none of the nay-saying, telling “Much mockery of Boris suggesting Channel bridge. If Macron had suggested it this would be hailed as a stroke of pro-European genius”. Macron would not have been so foolish as to suggest something so pointless. It’s a clear false equivalence.
Charles Arthur broke the bad news. “I really don’t think so. He wouldn’t have suggested it either because it’s barmy”. Cruel. Cruel, but fair. But Martin would not be diverted from his adoration of the Bozza: “really? The Chinese and the Japanese have tried plenty of precarious projects, and succeeded”. And here is the problem with inexpert pundits in one: what comparison has Martin done on those Chinese and Japanese projects? He hasn’t. Are any of them over busy shipping lanes? What about wind and sea conditions?
Worse, when informed of Bozza’s lamentable legacy as London Mayor (vanity cable car, vanity buses, vanity Garden Bridge, vanity island Airport, water cannon and the rest), Martin’s response - “reduced knife crime, successful Olympics” - was misleading and dishonest. Knife crime didn’t fall in Bozza’s first term, with the Olympics being secured by Ken Livingstone and brought to fruition by the likes of Seb Coe.
And as one observer noted, “One little issue with Le Boris Bridge - the towers would need to be much larger than the Petronas Towers (1500ft) above sea level to allow super tankers to pass. Channel is 700 ft at maximum depth. Queensferry Crossing towers are 600ft tall”. That’s just for starters. It’s a dead cat, nothing more, nothing less.
Yet we have one of the Pundit Establishment, who is regularly invited on by the broadcasters, backing this idea on the basis of zero research and no more than a hunch - plus of course Bozza is right now in hock to the Murdoch press, on pain of them opening the Sun safe and showing the world what they’ve got on him.
Iain Martin shows us what is wrong with our free and fearless press, and its woefully clueless pundits, without anyone having to stop and ask. Well done that man.