Piers Morgan’s Protest Meltdown

Former editor of the Daily Mirror - and the Murdoch Screws before that - Piers Morgan, whose career has progressed despite his being unceremoniously sacked from the editor’s chair at the Mirror, a share dealing controversy, his paper having most likely been involved in phone hacking, and an ability to bring out the worst in anyone who disagrees with The Great Man, is once again making a social media spectacle of himself.

Never knowingly undersold by Himself Personally Now

After finding that there were several women’s marches taking place across the globe, and that their primary target was Combover Crybaby Donald Trump and especially his derogatory language aimed at women, Morgan lost it. After all, The Donald is his Bestest Important Pal. He’s friends with the President. And he’s prepared to defend his pal, however indefensible his behaviour, and whatever the embarrassment to others.

So off he kicked: “Imagine if there were a load of men-only marches today? The feminists would go crackers”. Emma Kennedy clearly displeased him by putting him straight over the difference between assault and consensual acts, so it was time for a “look over there” moment: “just to be clear, you support what Bill Clinton did with Monica Lewinsky in the Oval Office while he was President?” And there was more.

Even though his campaign was progressing not necessarily to his advantage, Morgan bravely continued. “I'm planning a 'Men's March' to protest at the creeping global emasculation of my gender by rabid feminists. Who's with me?” he blustered. Jon Favreau, former chief speechwriter to Barack Obama, fielded that one with aplomb: “how much attention would you need to finally feel secure?” Not going well, was it?

But The Great Man had a trick in reserve: sneer at the Guardian! Of course - it works for his pals at Mail Online, so when Oliver Duggan, who works for the paper, asked him “Are you actually planning a 'Men's March'? When is it? And where?” back came the predictable slice of inverted snobbery: “Yes. In the middle of the Guardian newsroom”. Yeah, right. Like Kath Viner and her team would let him in the building.

That did not stop Morgan. After Duggan asked if he remembered what a newsroom looked like, he doubled down on the sneering: “I remember that your newsroom was always full of millionaires munching on rare imported lentils whilst bemoaning world poverty”. And on the subject of lentils, “Ask Polly Toynbee. I think she imports them with her truffles”. And another witless sneer.

Morgan is the one with a taste in expensive motors, a place in LA, and a tendency to play Loadsamoney as he waves his wad around social media trying to get others to enter bets, just so he can prove how much he can afford to lose. So he dislikes Ms Toynbee for having more style than he can muster. In any case, what he has such a problem with today goes against what he was saying only last May: “A right to protest should always be respected”.

And now James Ball of BuzzFeed is saying out loud what many must be thinking: “This has got to be getting embarrassing for ITV at this point”. Dead right it must. Especially as BuzzFeed have picked up on it, and other online sources may well follow.

Piers Morgan loses all sense of reason when anyone gets at his pal Trump. Does The Great Man have a problem with free dissenting speech? He’s not lining a job up with The Donald, surely? As Private Eye magazine might have said, I think we should be told.