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Tuesday 28 May 2019

The Danczuks Are Back Together

Those who look in regularly on Zelo Street will remember the saga of (thankfully) former Labour Party member and MP for Rochdale Simon Danczuk, suspended by the party and then barred from standing for it at the 2017 General Election. Spanker Si and his second wife Karen had become minor media Slebs, before they split and he was discovered to have been sending explicit texts to a 17-year-old girl.
The saga was not over, though, and while Kazza and her unfeasibly large chest took up with a young Spanish man and become briefly engaged to him, Spanker went through a series of relationships which all too often resulted in tabloid revelations - some of which were the result of tip-offs from one or other of the couple. The Si and Kazza show gave the red-tops so much cheap copy. And now, just for old time’s sake, it’s back.
Although his “Spanish Gaff” was rumoured to be on the market, and for a mere €53,000 - a 2 bedroom apartment in the Anglophone ghetto south of Alicante won’t fetch much nowadays - it seems there was no sale. And so it came to pass that last weekend Spanker Si Tweeted “Nice to be spending a bit of time at the Spanish gaff - glorious weather”. Not much of a view, though, unless you like looking at other Urbanizaciones in the distance.
Remember the good old days, tabloid hacks?

But, so what? Well, news has arrived on Zelo Street that Danczuk is not on a solo holiday right now. I can reveal that Kazza is there too. And their two long-suffering sons. The same scenario as when there was a late-night bust-up which ended up with Kazza carted off to the local A&E and Spanker in a cell at the nick in Orihuela.

Why this might be is down, as so much with the Danczuks, to money, or the lack of it. While Kazza is featuring less and less in her preferred role of media personality (no, don’t laugh), and edging ever closer to being forced to return to the Asda checkout whence she came, Spanker is apparently not doing as well as he would like in his role as a Research and Intelligence bod at a company called Shine.
Their website refers to him merely asSimon D”, telling “Simon brings a successful 20-year track record in researching and gathering intelligence … Simon founded a research, public affairs and communications consultancy; has held notable research positions and worked with academic institutions”, without mentioning the time as an MP, or that the consultancy he co-founded, Urban Visions Limited, went bust in 2011.

It has been put to me that Spanker is still not exactly flush with cash, and with Kazza not getting very many media appearances at all nowadays, holidaying on a budget has become not merely a necessity, but an imperative. So it is that they are cooped up together with the kids in that Algorfa apartment for the school holidays.
Bitter at leaving Labour, much?

The only change is that there is, as far as is known, no-one from Fame Flynet to do not-really candid snaps for the tabloids, or indeed any hacks to report on the latest Si and Kazza goings-on. But that may be about to change.

And when it does, Zelo Street will have more to tell. Stay tuned.
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Jonathan said...

The Toxic couple from my hometown, Danczuk had his selection rigged by NW Regional Office.
He lost out to Afzal Khan, a wonderful and kind Labour MP now for Gorton, but Si wasnt having any free thinking non Blairite representing Rochdale.
So Si and Kazza, began purging leftwingers like my former TU tutor from Rochdale CLP for daring to criticise his conduct.

Mark said...

He's obviously not content with just the mammaries, um memories!