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Friday 3 May 2019

Tommy Robinson’s Milkshake REALITY

After Wednesday’s trip to Bury, where Stephen Yaxley Lennon, who styles himself Tommy Robinson, found his campaign to be elected to the European Parliament developing not necessarily to his advantage, he and his team of heavies moved on to Warrington, where they discovered that the accuracy of milkshake throwing improves at close range, and that voters are not impressed by his team indulging in gratuitous violence.
As the Tweeter known as Haze has told, Lennon claimed he would be at the Old Market Place between 1200 and 1800 hours. He was late. Eventually The Great Man turned up outside Cash Generators (no comment). Someone turned up with a speaker blaring techno out which drowned out Lennon’s efforts. He then started moving around the town centre with his entourage, thus putting Golden Square Mall on lockdown.
It wasn’t going too well, was it? It got worse: Lennon’s pals - amateur comedy kidnapper Daniel Thomas has been identified as the one who kicked off first - attacked passers-by. Two required hospital treatment. A woman who was beaten by Lennon’s thugs was then subjected to a vicious barrage of hate on Facebook by Lennon’s “supporters".
Enter Danny Mahmud, who lives in Blackburn, but like so many young people nowadays, has to travel every day to find work. Yesterday he had been working in Warrington, and was on his way to Bank Quay Station when he found Lennon and his pals, along with a few unimpressed voters, barring his way. He tried to get around this obstruction, but in the process found himself face to face with The Great Man.
Mahmud clearly didn’t want to talk to Lennon. But The Great Tommy wouldn’t leave him alone. So he listened, and was even more unimpressed. Lennon wouldn’t leave it. But Danny Mahmud had one weapon in his arsenal: a milkshake. And at such short range, there was only one place the milkshake was going. And so it came to pass.
SPLAT! There it was, all over Lennon’s face, and all over his reassuringly expensive jacket. For his pains, Mahmud was racially abused by Lennon’s goons. But the memes had already started, with one Tweeter advising “Tommy Robinson is at Middleton Shopping Centre tomorrow (3rd May) from 11am. You can make his sphincter twitch by following him around with a milkshake if you have nothing better to do. Please retweet for maximum twitch”. Lennon was up at 0400 hours this morning, so he’ll be late. Again.
NewsThump went one better, with “McDonald’s releases new Tommy Robinson McThuggets with free milkshake”. They’re 100% chicken! Meanwhile, no voters have been convinced, and it is clearly time that the Police removed Daniel Thomas to a more appropriate location - like the local nick - before he assaults someone else.
Beating up women might impress the pond life who idolise Stephen Lennon, but it won’t gain him any votes. There is no point in him carrying on his campaign if all that is going to happen is that his pals use it as an excuse to indulge in gratuitous violence.

Still, there will be plenty of milkshake hurling opportunities. Look on the bright side.
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Mark said...

Proud of Warrington and Mr Mahmud. I hope he gets free MaccieD's for life from either Warrington or his hometown!

Neil said...

His minders are getting a bit tetchy. There's going to be another thumping soon. I'm just hoping that Tommy loses his rag and hits someone and it's captured on camera. This will be his Greg Stillson moment a la The Dead Zone

Anonymous said...

Mahmud is on video stalking Tommy allday long. You also forgot to mention that the little paki assaulted 2 females who are on camera complaining to the inept police. If you are going to do a report then at least get your facts correct. The paki lad has already been proven a liar by him stating he was in town for a meeting and was on his way home when incident occured. That was a lie and no doubt Tommy calling him a paki is a lie too

Anonymous said...

Great treding story means more votes for Tommy well done you idiots

Tim Fenton said...


Your comment might have had some effect, had it been written in coherent English.


Thank you for showing that Lennon and his hangers-on are nailed-on racist bigots. Now run along and troll someone else's blog.

Jon said...


If you believe the rubbish you posted then you're an easily fooled racist idiot.

If you don't believe the rubbish you posted then you're a liar, and an easily fooled racist idiot for thinking people will fall for your bullshit.

Either way you're a easily fooled racist idiot.

You're just the kind of supporter Yaxley-Lennon needs when he's trying to convince the world he isn't also a racist idiot. So yeah, keep up the good work. I'm sure Stephen will appreciate it.

Sam B. said...

So love Anonymous claiming that it was false that Yaxley-Lennon called Milkshake Man a "little paki" but then calls him...err.."the little paki".