Tories - Another Fine Messina

The Conservative Party has engaged the services of Jim Messina, former campaign stalwart for the Obama/Biden ticket that has fought two successful US Presidential Elections, and will no doubt have paid handsomely for it. Well, whatever they’re paying at CCHQ, they are getting not so much value for money as a shedload of ridicule, after an orchestrated post-Question Time Twitter assault backfired yesterday.

Messina kicked off immediately Young Dave had finished, proclaiming “Strong commanding performance from Cameron. He was outstanding”. So many clueless Tory candidates and cheerleaders joined in that, ten minutes later, Rob Hutton had picked up on it: “There is certainly some strong commanding going on somewhere”. Messina had made Lynton Crosby look subtle and understated.

This quickly became a comedy genre in its own right. Tweeter @thesophie smelt a rat: “What a strong, commanding smell from my toilet” she observed. Ben Powell was tucking up with a relaxing nightcap: “Just having a strong, commanding lemsip to deal with my cold”. And the ridicule was only getting started.

Tony Bennett judged that the experience required a stronger nightcap: “Now I need a strong commanding glass of whisky”. Meanwhile, Stuart S had decided to mention that not everything about Cameron’s performance had been as wonderful as all that: “Strong commanding performance from Cameron's sweaty lip tonight”.

Elsewhere in the Twittersphere, there was more forthright judgment of Dave’s performance: “A strong, commanding performance by @David_Cameron  in his bellendary exam this evening” was one conclusion. Actually, make that two very similar conclusions: “A strong, commanding performance from @David_Cameron tonight....in total bellendry”.

Yes, the word “Bellend” was on many lips. Meanwhile, @springjack wanted everyone to know “What a strong, commanding performance. Me in the supermarket today”, while @daisydabbles was concerned. “'Strong and commanding'?! Christ.. Are we talking about David Cameron or Christian Grey?” Difficult one to tie down, that.

Tweeter @psychibz decided to turn in, but kept Messina’s words in mind: “Just getting into bed with the Mrs.  Hoping for a strong, commanding performance”. And, to put the lid on it, @calluphid used the exercise as an excuse to get out That Bullingdon Photograph: “A strong & commanding stance in this photo of Dave #Cameron and chums”.

Jim Messina and the Tories have between them turned their spin into ridicule - at their expense. And whatever CCHQ is bunging him - it’s not even enough to get him to change his Twitter background, which still has the Obama/Biden logo proudly displayed. What a shambles. What a total farce. And what a total waste of money.