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Saturday 13 June 2020

Ash Sarkar For LBC? You Bet!

After Brexit Party Oberscheissenführer Nigel “Thirsty” Farage had his tenure at broadcaster LBC terminated last week, to the intense relief of many who had wished that it had happened rather earlier, attention turned to possible replacements. Inevitably, this meant someone would soon be running a book and taking bets. The result was not conducive to all those loyal followers of the Farage Falange.
Star Sports Bookmakers had the usual right-wingers in among the also-rans - Ross Kempsell, Tom Harwood, Darren Grimes, Laurence Fox, Allison Pearson, Brendan O’Neill, Kate Hoey, Nick Timothy, and Richard Tice immediately above Isabel Oakeshott (no sniggering at the back). Iain Dale and Andrew Pierce were well-placed; perhaps those betting had forgotten that they are already LBC hosts.
But out in front, after a flurry of bets yesterday afternoon? You’ll love this. “Yet more moves in a very hot market! [Ash Sarkar] is now 11/4 favourite, with [Andrew Pierce] now 7’s, whilst [George Osborne] (him? That’s a straight Fuck Off, thanks), [Isabel Oakeshott] (both 16’s), [Alexander Phillips] & [Paul Embery] (both 40/1) all enter the fray”.
Ash Sarkar. A name certain to induce Gammon self-immolation, to have good Home Counties Tories rushing for the hypertension medication, a guarantee of a bumper postbag from all those Disgusteds of Tunbridge Wells. Could LBC actually replace Mr Thirsty with Ash Sarkar? Did they mean her? They surely did.
As the odds tumbled, Matthew Butcher pointed out “[Ash Sarkar] 33/1 to replace Farage on LBC”. Ms Sarkar added “It’ll go lower.” Did she know something we didn’t? As the odds fell to 12/1, Aaron Bastani weighed in. “If [LBC] are serious about diversity in any meaningful sense, including the political views of their presenters, this would make [Ash Sarkar] a leading contender to replace Farage. Can you IMAGINE the meltdown?
And with those odds narrowing to 11/4, James Foster observed “How brilliant is this? [Ash Sakar] is favourite to take over from [Nigel Farage]. Don’t f*ck it up, LBC”. Harriet Williamson approved of that news. “I want [Ash Sarkar] to take over Farage’s LBC slot. You’d love to see it”. Well, I personally would, but some on the right would not be happy.
Billy Wells, though, was both happy and not on the right. “I’ll be dancing in the street if Ash gets it, my only disappointment will be not seeing Farage’s head implode when he realises a BAME woman and a communist....it’ll be like being stabbed in the back for him”. The possibility of Nige spontaneously combusting at her appointment is not a trivial one.
But Ms Sarkar was, as ever, modest about the sudden kerfuffle, telling anyone prepared to listen “Honestly, [LBC] should be seriously considering [William Kedjanyi]”. The anti-racism campaigner was well down the list, though. Ms Sarkar might just get the nod.

From employing Katie Hopkins and Nigel Farage to then go for Ash Sarkar - that really would be a journey of redemption. So how about it, LBC?
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grim northerner said...

Tony Blair?

Johnspartacusanonymous said...

Suspect it'll be another right wing drone, out of the plentiful pond-full here in C. London

grim northerner said...

I quite like the idea of Alastair Campbell broadcasting his slow motion nervous breakdown to the nation.