After former Sun editor Kelvin McFilth had gone after Channel 4 News for their effrontery in allowing a Muslim woman wearing a hijab to anchor the show at a time when he happened to be watching, the gloves rapidly came off. Thousands complained to press regulator IPSO. Presenter Fatima Manji also complained to IPSO. So did her boss. Kel was facing censure, and not for the first time in his singularly undistinguished career.
Would the Murdoch mafiosi manage to square things with IPSO, on whose board they had managed to place Rupe’s deeply unpleasant yet faithful retainer Trevor Kavanagh? If not, Kel could be in the mire. He decided that attack would be the best form of defence, and declared that he would make a complaint to Ofcom about Channel 4 News, on the grounds that it was not impartial. He would make his decision by last Friday.
Well, the deadline for Kel’s decision on whether to make his complaint has come and gone, so what news of the McFilth campaign against the press’ most hated broadcaster? He’s been taking a brief sojourn away from the rigours of putting aside an hour or so twice a week and rattling off another alleged column, but now The Great Man is back and ranting. What does he have to tell his army of adoring readers?
Sadly, Kel seems reluctant to share his thoughts with us today, at least on that particular subject. He devotes much of his column to whining about car-hire giant Hertz, telling that they ripped him off over insurance costs when he was in France, and that he is going to have his revenge: “I will be taking my case to the powerful Competitions and Markets Authority and Sajid Javid, the new Business Minister”. Yeah, right.
Like Sajid Javid has time for a witless blowhard like Kelvin McFilth. Why should he see Kel, anyway? “All car rental insurances should be thrown open to the market so that, as with price comparison sites, you can simply put in your details and companies will bid for your business”. Try reading the wording of the contract you signed on to, dummy. Others have tried and failed. And besides, what about Channel 4 News?
To get an answer to that one, you have to scroll down to the very foot of Kel’s column, and decode this snippet: “IF the new C4 dating show Naked Attraction, in which contestants have their faces hidden but display their penises and vaginas, is ever short of a large cock they could always ask the current editor of C4 News to appear”. A plain English translation of this gem will tell you all you need to know.
What this means is that Kelvin McFilth has turned tail and chickened out of making a complaint to Ofcom. There are straightforward reasons for this: he’s a spineless coward, making a complaint would involve actually taking time out to engage brain, he’s spent much of the past few weeks slagging off Channel 4 (not helpful), and most importantly, his complaint would be laughed out of court. It’s not going to happen.
And he’s so yellow he daren’t tell his readers. What a sad and total loser.