Singer Lily Allen was at the Notting Hill carnival last weekend. There, she drank some cider, had a swig or three of JD, and may have smoked a roll-up. And, so what? Well, for one newspaper, this was a big deal. A big deal that has spilled over from Sleb interest into the creepiest kind of obsession. Because Lily Allen has incurred the displeasure of Rupert Murdoch, a man with no discernible sense of humour.
After the Sun “reported” on Ms Allen overdoing it at the Carnival - that’s “reported” as in the online copy of the article featuring a video clip and Twenty-Seven photos - complete with the obligatory “an onlooker” (code for “someone in the Sun newsroom who’s good at making stuff up”) and graphic description of events, which involved an obsessive pursuit of her and her friends, has come another hatchet job today.
“PICKLED LILY After carnival carnage we look at the debauched decade that’s turned Lily Allen from budding star to tortured soul … Mum-of-two pop star is partying harder than ever as her marriage falls apart - leaving pals fearing she's headed for an almighty fall”. Which “pals” would those be? As if you need to ask: we get one “source close to the singer”, which means a Sun hack who once met her.
Then there is “a source”, which means roughly the same as “an onlooker”, and just for good measure “a music source”, which probably means a Sun hack who knows how to download stuff from iTunes. All of those not-really-pals of Ms Allen agree that her life may be “spiralling out of control”. But it was an incident where Ms Allen was very much in control that sparked the obsession, not that the Murdoch doggies will tell you that.
The real reason for the Sun’s obsession is nothing to do with concerns for Ms Allen’s health, but a straightforward punishment beating meted out as crude and vindictive retaliation for what happened only last month, when she met Don Rupioni at a garden party. She didn’t just meet him, she let the world know about it.
Taking to Twitter, she told her followers “I'm at a garden party. Hope I'm not sitting next to Voldemort or Fromage. I might be sick”. Voldemort was a reference to Murdoch. Fromage was former UKIP leader Nigel “Thirsty” Farage. Creepy Uncle Rupe is clearly not best pleased at being snapped by Ms Allen. He will have been even less happy at her Tweeting a brief video telling “Liam Fox , Murdoch and Farage , breaking bread here”.
This showed the continuing ability of an interfering foreigner to stick his bugle into UK politics - and the willingness of clowns like Fox to indulge him. But it was another short video Ms Allen Tweeted out, showing Murdoch being led away by new wife Jerry Hall, that sealed her fate. It was captioned simply “Nappy change”.
Rupert Murdoch doesn’t do “sense of humour”. Nor does he tolerate mere upstarts suggesting that he might be past his prime. He therefore has to show that he is still strong. Hence the hit pieces in the Sun, with all their voyeurism and obsession.
That’s what happens when you cross Rupert Murdoch. No change there, then.