After yesterday’s exposing of Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson as a politician of less than total probity and substance, Young Dave could afford a brief celebration. But his enjoyment of a rival’s downfall has been short-lived, as Rupe’s downmarket troops at the Sun have not taken the news of their latest champion well. Someone has to be hatcheted for that. And it turns out to be Cameron.
Obediently doing the deed for his lord and master is Trevor Kavanagh, providing a masterclass in Orwellian reality bending and superbly crafted Newspeak as he lays into the Prime Minister for the cross-party deal on press regulation, which happened several days ago. Kavanagh sets the credibility bar low, calling Mil The Younger “A Marxist-born Lefty”. How can you be born a Marxist? What a meathead.
Still, as the man said, there’s more: events on the press regulation front “are already unravelling”. Bit late there, Trev, your pals have been using that one for a few days now and nothing’s unravelled yet. But wait – he’s brought his Godwin moment in early: “the Axis powers – Labour, Lib Dems and Hacked Off”. Labour, with a Jewish leader whose Dad’s family fled the Nazis. Stay classy, Trev.
Then it’s back to straightforward dishonesty: “Now, as the shabby deal unravels, with ministers having second thoughts and even Hacked Off admitting they went too far”. It still ain’t unravelling, nobody’s having second thoughts, and Hacked Off aren’t admitting anything. But other than that, Trev, you’re spot on. And the best whopper in the entire article is yet to come.
“This saga raises questions about Cameron’s stamina and tenacity ... Last time, at an EU spending summit, it paid off. Budgets were cut. But it was an act of impulse, not a carefully planned Downing Street strategy”. Oh, just shove right off, Kav. The UK Government team played anything but an impulsive game, building alliances and persuading others of their case. It was planned, and very well planned.
Christ on a bike, this pundit expects his readers not to see through that. But that’s the low expectation the Sun’s journalists have of their readers, demonstrated by the next assertion: “Freedom of the Press is a major casualty of Cameron’s failure to pay attention”. This falsely assumes the new regulator will curtail press freedom, and he certainly did pay attention – he’d have lost the vote if he hadn’t acted.
Then he signs off in true style: “if he can’t stand up to a bunch of third-rate zealots led by a faded showbiz luvvie, what hope does he have against the mafia bullies who run the European Union”. Murdoch gofer says a transparent organisation with a democratically elected Parliament is run by the mafia, and that an effective campaign group is “third-rate”. You’re not hot on this credibility stuff, are you, Trev?
Never mind, though, it’ll still do its job lining birdcages. So that’s all right, then.