(c) Doc Hackenbush 2014
“Charlotte Church And Louise Mensch Engage In Fiery Twitter Row About Austerity … The feud between Louise Mensch and Charlotte Church just turned ultra nasty … A fresh war of words erupted after Church Tweeted of her pride in having taken part in the anti-austerity rally in London on Saturday” told Sara Nelson at the HuffPost. Er, no it didn’t.
Ms Church did not debate with the former MP at any time, and this can be clearly seen by taking the Twitter feeds in sequence, as is done here. The singer told her followers “So proud to have marched with 250,000 people against austerity. Here's the transcript of my speech in Parliament Sq” on Saturday evening. The following evening she signed off with “All of the narrow minded trolls, I'm bored now. I hope you can try and work out the Stockholm Syndrome stuff you have going on”.
Even on Monday afternoon, as Ms Church mused “The thing I find interesting with the uptight right is, if they are so individualistic, why does what I think bother them so much? Genuinely”, there was nothing from Lou-You-Know-Who. Only yesterday morning, unprompted, the member for the distant constituency of Manhattan Upmarket sneered “hahahaha get back in the ‘VIP area’ of the ‘austerity protest’ you useless hypocrite”.
There was more. Rather a lot more: “My God but @charlottechurch's feed is a car crash isn't it? Reading it you wonder if Labour will ever win again #RussellBrand #VIPtent”. Would Madam like to make a little more sense? Maybe not: “Hey @CharlotteChurch the #antiausterityprotest was only 25,000 people according to @metpoliceuk … you lose again”. You’re nearly three days late, Louise. Whatever. She wasn’t done yet.
There was the politics Amateur Hour to come: “Hilarious that @CharlotteChurch calls the NHS 'underfunded' when for two elections running @Conservatives given it more funds than @UKLabour”. That’s what reading English Language and Literature at Oxford gets you. Then came the pièce de résistance: “It's almost as if @CharlotteChurch was an overpaid bolinger bolshevik who didn't have a fucking clue #hmmm #moron”.
It might have been moderately amusing, if only she could have spelt Bollinger correctly. In any case, why rant at someone who’s not listening? “Never noticed her before but saw an RT of her moaning at @screwlabour then browsed her hypocritical feed”. So that makes no sense, either. All that was left was for Ms Church to sign off “I 'm so pleased to have pissed off both Katie Hopkins and @LouiseMensch”, without needing to take part.