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Thursday 12 March 2020

Dominic Raab Is Also Unwell

After the news that Mid Bedfordshire’s Tory MP (yes, it’s her again) Nadine Dorries had contracted the Coronavirus, and had attended a 10 Downing Street reception and a constituency surgery before self-isolating, the thought occurred to some MPs that having more than 600 of them in a relatively confined space - like the House of Commons - might not be the best idea when the idea was to try and contain the virus.
But, sadly, the penny dropped too late for Ms Dorries’ fellow junior health minister Ed Argar, who, according to the Guardian, “is also self-isolating after having dinner with Nadine Dorries on Thursday night”. He has appeared at the Dispatch Box looking unwell and coughing. In close proximity to many of his fellow MPs.

The Guardian has also told “A cabinet minister is among a growing number of people who have self-isolated after coming into contact with the health minister, Nadine Dorries, before she tested positive for coronavirus. A government source confirmed on Wednesday evening that the senior minister was among those in voluntary isolation awaiting the results of tests, but would not confirm who it was”. Would they not?
SNIFF ... SNOT ... WIPE ...

Well, perhaps yesterday’s Prime Minister’s Questions can give us a hint. There were the Tories, lined up in support of alleged Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson, and then one of their number began to cough. And rather than availing himself of a tissue or handkerchief, and eschewing such niceties as coughing into the closed elbow, he coughed into his hand. That cabinet minister was Dominic Raab.

While Liz Truss, sitting to Raab’s right, and indeed to most people’s right, merely stared upwards with a sort of far-far-away expression on her face, two places to Raab’s left, transport secretary Grant “Spiv” Shapps was not so calm, looking concernedly at his colleague and perhaps wondering if that colleague should have been there.
... COUGH ... HONK ... SPIT

Also not unadjacent to Raab were health secretary Matt Hancock and Chancellor Rishi Sunak … and Bozo The Clown himself, who, like Raab, has ignored the advice not to touch the face. Raab is submitting himself to a Covid-19 test, but brave Bozo has decided, despite hosting the fragrant Nadine at his place last Thursday, not to take one.

And after Sunak delivered his Budget Statement, Hancock, Bozo, and others congratulated him with pats on the back and shoulders, plus the ejection of pore-laden moist air in his general direction. So if, as many expect, Raab’s Covid-19 test comes back positive, and he is named as the self-isolating cabinet minister, it will not be long before several of his colleagues have to do the test, too. Cos by then they will be infected.
Well done Rishi, have some Onward Transmission

It is going to be difficult for the Government to persuade the public to take its Coronavirus advice when so many of its ministers seem so slow to take up the advice themselves.

And if they can’t attend Parliament for a few weeks … most likely no-one will notice.
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Paul said...

Charlotte Nicholls MP watched the budget speech on TV in her office. Sensible young person.
The sooner they get out of that hellish pit into a properly designed debating space, the better.

Anonymous said...

Honestly, this is just too too fucking funny for more words......

The Toffee (597) said...

demonic raabid is unwell?

No shit, Sherlock!

Anonymous said...

Cracking tweet from "mike barnes".

"Wow! The virus has crossed over from humans to tories".

Pass it on - the tweet, not the virus.

Burlington Bertie from Bow said...

This is beginning to sound like that Hancock script where the malevolent radio soap narrator eliminates all his rival characters one by one in some terrible catastrophic accident.

Is it too much to hope.....?

Jonathan said...

All I can say, I hope the Corona virus teaches these narcissistic, nasty spiteful Tories that they better start acting on the advice they serve up to the public.

I do hope the virus gets well soon,it's very unpleasant to be in contact with Mad Nad Dorres, just ask the animals in the Outback, still shaking at the Mad Nad's short lived I'm a Celebrity Get me out of here!

Anonymous said...

Nothing would give me more pleasure than to see that Gothic monstrosity torn down.

RodJ said...

It would be too, too tragic if any of them were to succumb to the virus.