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Wednesday 29 July 2015

Captain Bellend - Pants On Fire

Not content with his previous mardy strop exhibition at being found out by the Labour Party and his application to become a registered supporter refused, the loathsome Toby Young has been given a platform by the Telegraph - not that they’re partisan in the Labour leadership election, you understand - to whine that this effectively means the whole process is somehow suspect, as well as it jolly well not being fair.
Fire extinguisher for Tobes!

Zelo Street readers may recall that Tobes found he could sign up as a supporter for just £3, did so, then threatened legal action when he was rumbled and Labour declined to give him his money back. By this time, though he now claims otherwise, he would have had to make two fraudulent declarations - to assert he supported the party’s aims, and that he was not a member of an organisation opposed to it - to complete his application.

This all happened six weeks ago. But, like the BBC which he, along with all those other Clever People Who Talk Loudly In Restaurants, hate with a passion obligatory among the ideological right, Tobes is not averse to the occasional repeat, and so back he has come to tellLabour has purged me from their leadership election. How many more will follow?” And, who knows? More importantly, who cares?

But he wants anyone still reading to know that he’s serious: “Harriet Harman is right to stop Tories from infiltrating the contest. But a broader cull could undermine the leadership election result”. So let’s take this one nice and slowly. Weeding out the likes of Tobes is the right thing to do, but Ms Harman and her team should not remove too many names - how many we are not told - because that would not be the right thing to do.

It gets worse: “The chief difficult [sic] faced by those trying to police this election is that the new rules leave it unclear as to who should be entitled to vote. Harman says she also wants to weed out members of hard left groups like Militant - and gave Derek Hatton as an example - but it’s hard to see how Labour can do that while, at the same time, allowing members of Unite the Union to sign up”. No thanks Tobes, I don’t want to look over there.

Think about that. A supposedly mainstream pundit suggests that being a member of a Trades Union is equivalent to being part of the Militant Tendency. That’s the kind of stupidity that would get someone run out of the stupid faculty of the University of Stupid in Stupid City. And it gets worse than that.

If you try and become a ‘registered supporter’, you’re asked to confirm that you ‘support the aims and values of the Labour Party’ and that you are ‘not a supporter of any organisation opposed to it’. I wasn’t asked that question when I applied earlier this month and it’s clearly been introduced to exclude members of the Conservative Party – honest ones, anyway”. Tobes’ pants are now well and truly alight.

That declaration was on the Labour website on the day Tobes made his application - as the screen shot in my previous blogpost shows. His claim is totally untrue. Should he have problems with being called out for his flagrant dishonesty, he is free to contact his legal representative - there will inevitably be a first time for me to refer someone to the precedent case of Arkell versus Pressdram 1971.

The Labour Party’s electoral processes are a matter for the Labour Party. End of story.


Anonymous said...

Tim, Sorry but I can't resist this cheap shot:


Funny that, didn't neocons years ago get their boxies in an uproar about "entrism" in the Labour Party?.....But now it seems OK......

Incidentally, LOVED the line about People Who Talk Loudly In Restaurants. I speak as someone heavily in favour of pouring scalding hot soup into the crotch of anybody behaving thus. Like Bullingdon Bozo.

Arnold said...

"you ‘support the aims and values " A prerequisite of joining any organisation surely?

Andy McDonald said...

Perhaps Toby needs to ask why under any circumstances an 'honest' member of the Conservative party (or supporter of it) would want to join the Labour party? To take advantage of the cheap beer offer? Discounts at Alton Towers?

The only reason a Tory (member or supporter) would join the Labour party would be to cause shenanigans, something intrinsically dishonest*. Same goes for any other political party. That's why it's rather difficult to claim membership of more than one, especially when they're diametrically opposed.

*Also, Toby, if you're going to come up with a wizard wheeze, it's best to keep it secret. Telling everyone about how brilliant you are in a national newspaper does tend to give the game away. Danny Ocean you are not.

Celia said...

LOL at "honest" members of the Conservative party. Yes, very honest to try and join an organisation in order to ruin it, you DAFFY FUCKER.

Personally, I spent my £3 on chocolate, and I urge other anxious indecisive people to do the same.

rob said...

I wonder if he expects the parents who submit entry forms to his schools to "fiddle" them so that he gets the "right" pupils?

And will the parents expect of him some misrepresentations in the schools prospectus given his record in making such misrepresentations elsewhere?

Has he s'queered his pitch! The rotter s'quelched?

Andy McDonald said...

In a number of cases - pretending to be religious to get your kids into school, engaging in financial sharp practice or lying your arse off to get more out of the sale of your home, that sort of thing - the attitude of the right wing media has been "That's OK because everyone does it and there's no shame in wanting to get ahead".

Or, more accurately, "...because *people like us* do it...". But yes, the same attitude we saw during the Thatcher years, morality is for other people. If you're 'one of us', do whatever you like.

Anonymous said...

His childish ruse is the equivalent of an Arsenal supporter buying a season ticket for Tottenham so they can go to White Hart Lane and watch a team they don't support lose!

wildcat said...

I tweeted him pointing out that committing electoral fraud (that's what it is) and then boasting about it, encouraging others to do likewise, and finally whinging about the non return of his £3 when it was found out, was "priceless"

He blocked me.

What an absolute fucking prat.