Flannelled Fool Royal Pants On Fire

Yesterday, the Sun’s new editor Tony Gallagher began his tenure as yet another taker of the Murdoch shilling. His first front page was therefore today’s, which brought a lead story byline credit for the odious flannelled fool Henry Cole, formerly tame gofer to the perpetually thirsty Paul Staines at the Guido Fawkes blog, who kept up the habit of his lifetime so far by cobbling together a complete pack of lies.

An unsavoury sleazebag airs his views

The headline was all that a connoisseur of Sun dishonesty could wish for: “LABOUR HYPOCRITE … Leftie who hates the Royals WILL kiss Queen’s hand to grab £6.2m … COURT JEZTER” (geddit?!?). It was bold, it was brash, it was in your face, and any editor will the odd ounce of journalistic principle should have ensured that it was also in the bin. And soon enough it was unravelling with embarrassing swiftness.

“New Labour boss Jeremy Corbyn, who once backed a Bill to abolish the monarchy, will be forced to bend his knee before the Queen and kiss her hand in order to secure his position as official Leader of the Opposition”. Bullshit. He is official leader of the opposition right now. Try again. “Mr Corbyn will join the Queen’s Privy Council, despite previous claims he would shun Her Majesty”. What claims would those be, Master Cole?

“Insiders say the installation ceremony involves kneeling on a cushion and then brushing the lips against the hand of the monarch while swearing to be a ‘true and faithful Servant’”. Insiders my arse. Cole got that out of a book on Royal protocol. Can it get any worse? You betcha, says Sarah: “This stunning act of loyalty exposes the hypocrisy of the life-long campaigner for Britain to abolish the Royal Family”.

Master Cole may not have been around at the time, but Jeremy Corbyn would never have been allowed to take his seat in the Commons, had he not sworn an act of loyalty. So there is bugger all “stunning” about his joining the Privy Council, which, as any fule kno, means he gets the security briefings that Young Dave and his jolly good chaps spent most of the weekend saying he shouldn’t be allowed to have. And there’s more.

“Had Mr Corbyn refused the traditional invitation to join the ancient advisory panel – which gives members ‘The Right Honourable’ title – he would have triggered a constitutional crisis and jeopardised Labour’s taxpayer funding. Expert lawyer Richard Gordon QC told the Sun yesterday that ‘rejection of PC membership by Jeremy Corbyn could raise issues – at least in the short-term – relating to the constitutional status of the official opposition’”.

There would be no jeopardy to “taxpayer funding” - what is known as “Short Money” has no connection to the party leader being a Privy Councillor. And Richard Gordon, as James Ball of BuzzFeed UK has revealed, has firmly asserted “My reasoning that refusal of a place [on the Privy Council] could (the word I allowed to be cited) raise constitutional issues was not related to Short money”. Oh dear, Master Cole!

It gets even worse. “On top of Labour potentially losing £6.2m a year in official ‘short money’ opposition funding” blusters Cole, despite this claim being total fiction. There is even time for “Sources close to Mr Corbyn suggest [sic] during his leadership campaign that he would reject any offer to join the Privy Council”. You and your mates at the Sun once stood next to him, right? Pull the other one. Not a good front page start, Tone.