With EU withdrawal negotiations restarting soon, an increasingly fractious party, and deadlines looming, the last thing Theresa May needs is the arrival on the scene of yet another self-appointed shyster with no actual knowledge of what is going on, but the ability to talk well, and lie badly. But that is what she is apparently going to get, after former UKIP Oberscheissenführer Nigel “Thirsty” Farage proclaimed his return.
Squeaky new payday finger up the bum time
And this time, Nige has pledged his loyalty not to the Kippers, but to Leave Means Leave, the group headed up by the rictus perma-smile of Richard Tice, who believes that Brexit will be a great success if we all become more optimistic and smile like him. For Tice, walking off a cliff edge is about nothing more than ritual incantation.
In support of this move to demonstrate the inflexibility of the laws of gravity, Nige has blustered “I can see that in the autumn there's going to be a big campaign … What they will try to do is to suspend Article 50, to delay the date on which we're actually supposed to leave … It’s time we fought back”. And, unfortunately, there was more.
Whence he came ...
“Frankly, Chequers, and everything else that's been happening in parliament, is nothing less than a direct betrayal of everything people voted for … Chequers leaves us half in, half out … Let me assure you that 17.4 million people are not stupid, they're not idiots, they knew what they were voting for … They've had enough of being talked down to by politicians, by big business leaders, by elements of the media”.
... and where he is most likely heading
Being talked down to by gobshites who wouldn’t know a negotiated settlement if it jumped up and kicked them in the undercarriage, as well. But, as Clive James might have said, I digress. Farage has not “returned”. He’s never been an active politician in the UK, because his record of contesting elections here has been one of abject failure.
Worse, he couldn’t give the proverbial flying foxtrot what all those who voted Leave really want. Had he been so concerned, he would not have gone off to the USA, nor would he have dedicated himself to his LBC show. The reason he has signalled a return to campaigning is because he is, as ever, following the money.
That, in turn, suggests that LBC has indeed decided to drop Mr Thirsty from its roster of hosts to make way for the arrival of proper journalist Eddie Mair from the BBC. But why not just go back to UKIP? Simples. One, the Kippers have become an even more irrelevant laughing stock under the clueless and bigoted leadership of Adolf von Batten. And two, as a result, the money is not going to be going anywhere near them any time soon.
So, Three, the likes of Steve Bannon is going to throw his money at a more credible disruptive force here in the UK. And that means Farage. If Nige can be part of a successful May-bashing operation, perhaps other far-right leaders in mainland Europe will listen to Bannon and his plans for world domination. Hence Leave Means Leave.
But Nigel Farage remains a rabble-rousing hate monger, who, it should be remembered, unveiled his racist “Breaking Point” poster on the morning that Jo Cox was murdered.
He should therefore be treated as the pariah he really is. Hello BBC people.
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