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Sunday 24 March 2019

Whatever The Question, Gove Is NOT The Answer

Still Theresa May staggers on, lurching - along with her party, and indeed her country - from one avoidable crisis to the next, but the vultures are beginning to circle. And despite the admonishment handed out to those plotting to dispose of the PM by former Tory leader Iain Duncan Cough on The Andy Marr Show™, telling that there isn’t going to be a change of leader, well, if the knives are already out, then there probably is.
Besides, whenever Duncan Cough says something definitely isn’t going to happen, the possibility of it happening, and soon, increases dramatically. So it is only fair to consider who might succeed the joint worst Prime Minister ever, a title Ms May shares with the equally disastrous David Cameron, who talked the talk, but when it came to walking the walk, dropped the UK in the mire and then ran away.

Some media outlets are suggesting that the likeable - well, for a Tory, anyway - David Lidington may step in on what is being described as a caretaker basis. The only problem he has is that Leave backers in the Tory ranks wouldn’t have another Remainer. Which brings us to the other option being touted around the press today, and that is Michael “Oiky” Gove. And whatever the question, Gove is never the answer.
There are many reasons why Gove is not fit to shovel human by-product from Heap A to Heap B, let alone occupy 10 Downing Street, but Zelo Street will home in on just three (you can see an alternative take from Chris Henry HERE).

One, Walking Around With An Offensive Wife, to quote the Not The Nine O’Clock News sketch. Mrs “Oiky” Gove, the appalling Sarah “Vain” Vine, is not only a Daily Mail columnist of no known tactfulness, she is a schemer in the Lady Macbeth Premier League. She also has a habit of incautiously Tweeting after what might be termed Wine O’Clock.
Two, Gove wreaked havoc at the Department for Education during his term as Education Secretary, mainly by failing to keep control - perhaps deliberately - of his two polecats Dominic Cummings and Henry de Zoete. Cummings, believed to be the hand behind the infamous @toryeducation Twitter feed, was not fit to be let loose in Whitehall, or, indeed, as we now know, to run a referendum campaign. Unless cheating is allowed.

But the very worst aspect of Gove’s background is Number Three. He is not merely close to Rupert Murdoch and his fellow mafiosi, he is in effect a wholly owned subsidiary of their empire. Gove is the finest cabinet minister money can buy. Murdoch has bought him.
The reason Gove broke with his now former friend, London’s very occasional Mayor Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson - who is even less well suited to high office - is believed to be because he was informed that the Murdoch mafiosi had sufficient dirt on Bozza to end his political career, and so decided to run to succeed Cameron himself. I’ll go further: it is also believed that he got that tip-off from Rebekah Brooks herself.

And it is for that reason alone that Michael Gove should not be even considered for the Top Job. If Rupe and his fellow mafiosi want to dabble in politics, they can stand for elective office and subject themselves to public scrutiny. Otherwise they can shove off.

That is why, whatever the question may be, Michael Gove is never the answer.
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Anonymous said...

"Likeable Tory" - like "progressive Tory" - is a contradiction in terms. There ain't, and never will be, any setch animal.

Toryism itself is an evolutionary dead end with many mutant strains. None of them remotely "likeable" or "progressive". Think Anna Soubry or Norman Tebbitt or Seesil Parkinson or, Dr, Grant Shapps. Gobshites all.

Burlington Bertie from Bow said...

And all equally gobshitey, eh Anon?

A thoughtful piece from Tim and an utterly unpredictable and nuanced response from your good self.

I assume you didn't sully your ineffable purity by venturing into the Great Wen yesterday and rubbing shoulders with the metropolitan filth, but instead held your own little individual sea-green incorruptible event in your own back garden.

Mark said...

I completely disagree with this post Tim. Michael Gove is easily the answer.

When the question is who's that cunt? The answer just has to be Michael Gove

Arnold said...

Who stabbed Boris Johnson in the back during the last Conservative leadership contest?
Who's married to Sarah Whine?
I don't think you've thought this article through.

Ps. Why is this ite asking for picture verification again?

Anonymous said...

Imagine what the sight of that march did to the gammons of Britain.

The rest of the country can have bacon butties for life!