Carrie Doesn’t Spin Here Anymore

The latest issue of Private Eye magazine (#1534) has an item showing just how determined Carrie Symonds, still engaged to alleged Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson, is to get her own way. The Mail on Sunday was recently poised to splash photos of her from her University days all over its front page. But then she found out.

Carrie Symonds

The Number 10 press secretary called the MoS. Then, Bozo’s official spokesman called. After their requests failed, she leaned on her former partner, the odious flannelled fool Master Harry Cole, to try and use his influence with his former paper. This also failed (no surprise there, then) and so finally she got Bozo to tell the MoS “Carrie is really upset”.

She got the photos pulled from the front cover, although they were published on an inside page. This, though, seems not to be an exceptional occurrence: Ms Symonds has, it seems, vetoed the appointment of Vote Leave insider Lee Cain as Bozo’s chief of staff, which may actually be a good thing, but that is not the point.

Ms Symonds was not elected by anyone, other than Bozo’s electorate of Himself Personally Now. She does not form any part of the selection process for the chief of staff’s job, or indeed any other role in Downing Street or elsewhere. So when BBC political editor Laura Kuenssberg broke the news, she was less than rapturously received.

The Tweeter known as Otto English observed “So Carrie Symonds, the unelected unaccountable partner of the Prime Minister is allegedly deciding who the next chief of staff at Number 10 is. There's your #Chiefgate and your #Sovereignty in one easy to manage bundle Britain”. Then there was the deflection aspect of the story.

Tom Scott put it this way: “Whether or not Carrie Symonds dislikes Lee Cain is irrelevant. The real story is Number 10 appointing a man at the heart of Vote Leave's outstandingly dishonest campaign at a time when public trust in government has never been so crucial”. The Guardian has already considered the disruptive nature of a Cain appointment.

Also, Ms Symonds was not the only one with whom Bozo had been romantically entwined to be kicking off right now, as Michael Moran observed. “PM's fiancée Carrie Symonds 'deeply unhappy' about the Lee Cain farrago. PM's ex fancy-lady Jennifer Arcuri cross with PM about message to Joe Biden. Is this a government, or an outline for an EastEnders episode?” And Jennifer Cassidy reminded us that something was missing here.

“Riddle me this: what do you call a country that allows an unelected unaccountable official - the fiancée of a Prime Minister (Carrie Symonds) - to have any say in who the Chief or Staff is at Number 10? Hint: it’s not a democracy”. Also, Ms Symonds has significant previous form for being highly creative while not caring too much about either the truth, or what happens to the little people who find themselves in the firing line.

We are ruled by fools. Who are unelected and unaccountable. But you knew that anyway.

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