Sometimes the more over-enthusiastic among the punditerati overreach themselves in their efforts to please their masters. They become so stuck in the rut of churning out copy to satisfy the demands and desires of editors’ and proprietors’ agendas that the real world becomes a distant memory, a place only populated by all those ghastly oiks who failed to suck up to the right people and secure themselves six-figure paycheques.
Why did Kavanagh cross the road? To secure More And Bigger Paycheques For Himself Personally Now
Such is the fate that has befallen faithful Murdoch retainer Trevor Kavanagh, who has today decided to call out someone else for having questionable loyalties. His target, to very little surprise, is Baron Mandelson of Indeterminate Guacamole, who has had the effrontery to give an interview to a newspaper where they speak foreign.
The former Labour minister and spinner spoke to Die Zeit, which it itself is an insult to those in the Baby Shard bunker, as it is both upmarket and independent of the Murdoch mafiosi. He said, according to Kav’s pal David Wooding, the Sunday Sun hack who claims to be from Liverpool but spends very little time there, “One can only advise the Europeans one thing - forget Britain and take care of your own interests”.
EU member states should, in the Article 50 negotiations, look after their own interests first. The same will apply to Britain. But for Britain to do this is fine for the Murdoch goons, while for all those dastardly foreigners to do the same is tantamount to treason, especially if a former Labour minister who the Murdoch doggies don’t like suggests it. So Wooding translated Mandelson’s comment by saying “Mandelson branded a traitor”.
And it was enough for Kavanagh to roll out the approved catalogue of insults: “the Dark Prince … EX-COMMUNIST and proven liar … seasoned plotter … backstabbing Machiavelli … breathtaking act of treachery … two-timing Prince of Darkness … his 1980s debut with a sinister black moustache … absorbing the ruthless tricks of Soviet Russia”. As Sir Sean nearly said, I think we got the point.
At that moment, the thought occurred that Kavanagh is the last person to talk about questionable loyalty, lying, and potentially traitorous deeds. He is, after all, a fully paid-up servant of Don Rupioni, and his advocacy of the Leave campaign in last year’s referendum resulted in Sterling falling precipitously - thus leaving the economy vulnerable to rising prices for all those imported goods, and whatever is priced in US Dollars.
So fuel costs are rising, as is the cost of the weekly shop. But for Kav’s boss Rupert Murdoch there is only good news, as he has needed to bid rather less for that 61% of Sky that he does not yet own. After a few more months of rising prices, businesses deciding to up sticks and move to other EU member states, and all those East European workers leaving with no-one left to pick the crops and do the crap jobs, perhaps the Sun’s veteran pundit would like to lecture us once more about exactly who the traitors are.
Trevor Kavanagh has no room to call anyone else for disloyalty to Britain. End of story.