The Sun Backs Fouled Up Brexit

[Update at end of post]

As rumours swirl around concerning a yet longer transition period for Britain’s departure from the European Union, and Combover Crybaby Donald Trump shows us just what a favourable trade deal with the USA would look like, some of those who pushed the hardest for a Leave vote are beginning to have their regrets, not least former UKIP Oberscheissenführer Nigel “Thirsty” Farage, whose recantation came only the other day.

Squeaky humiliating climbdown finger up the bum time

Nige claimed live on LBC that he never said Brexit would be a success. And while some of his devotees may now find the scales lifting from their eyes, many in our free and fearless press remain committed to the cause, not least the inmates of the Baby Shard bunker. Here, the Sun’s non-bullying political editor Tom Newton Dunn has proclaimed a solution to the thorny issue of the Northern Ireland border. Except it isn’t.

No Tom, there's no such person as Wonder Woman

“Excl: Revealed - David Davis’s new Brexit plan to give Northern Ireland joint UK/EU status and a border buffer zone” he declared, unaware that he was two months late for April 1st. So what was this all about? “Two big developments for the Max Fac option (the only one under real consideration now) 1. DD has been persuaded a technological solution to keep the NI border open won’t work, so has moved to regulatory alignment ideas”.

Do go on. “2. Those alignments are just for NI; and involve the ‘Liechtenstein model’ of dual EU and UK regimes at the same time, plus a 10 mile border zone for local traders (eg dairy farmers) to cross at will. Hence, no need for any border infrastructure at all … This may just win agreement from the whole of the Cabinet Brexit Committee. Phew. But 2 huge further problems with it: the DUP likely to hate it, as a different settlement to rest of UK, and the EU will instantly throw it out”. It’s already DOA, then.

So there was hardly any point in the idea turning up in the first place, was there? The DUP won’t wear a different status for Northern Ireland to the rest of the UK. Liechtenstein has zero relevance to the Irish border question (it’s an EFTA member which has a monetary and customs union with Switzerland). The idea of a “buffer zone” is plain barking.

Which side of the border will it be on? Is the Irish Republic expected to yield 5 miles of its own, or will all 10 miles be on the Northern Ireland side, in which case it would impinge on the City of Derry (for instance)? And in any case, as Newton Dunn admits, the EU side will throw the whole idea out (if the DUP haven’t already forced the Tories to do so).

But this latest fiasco shows superbly just what a complete mess Brexit has become. The Sun’s political editor is prepared to actually spend time reporting an idea which has no credibility whatever. Farage’s admission that Brexit might not be a success brought an almost resigned response from Steve Bullock: “Not even pretending it's anything but damaging now. Brexit is nothing but dead dogma. An article of far-right faith that everyone must pay for”. And now Mr Thirsty is defending Trump’s tariff increases.

To which Otto English responded “Nigel Farage currently defending Trump's tariffs... which will directly impact on UK jobs ... because he's a patriot in the same way that a heated fan oven is a reliable place to keep your ice cream”.

Brexit means we’ve been sold a pup. Not even the populists, and the propagandists of the Sun, can pretend otherwise. So why is our Government persisting with this charade?

[UPDATE 1655 hours: Newton Dunn's "exclusive" has been torpedoed by a fellow inmate of the Baby Shard bunker. Sam Coates from the Times is the one putting his story out of its misery.

"No10 confirm what sources across government saying - that David Davis's plan for a Lichtenstein solution and a buffer zone - won't fly. A No10 spokesman says the PM 'will not accept a customs border down the Irish sea' ... I.E. no special status" he told.

So that's more sub-chip paper journalism from the Sun's political editor, then. Hardly worth his while filing copy of that standard, is it?]