Who can forget the events of Remembrance Day 2015? Well, our free and fearless press can, for starters: back then, one alleged slip by one party leader saw the entire right-wing pack descend in characteristic fashion on Jeremy Corbyn, for what was claimed to be an insufficiently grovelling bow, following his laying a wreath at the Cenotaph.
The Cenotaph, Whitehall
But four years on, and a different party leader not merely allegedly fouling up, but provably and comprehensively fouling up, and they all keep schtum. Because this time it was alleged Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson going horribly wrong, and to add to the Tories’ already shambolic election campaign would never do.
Bozo The Clown, as PM, would lay his wreath before other party leaders. But he had not been paying attention and set off before the attendant soldiers had been stood at ease. So he had to backtrack. The noticeable lack of attention - fidgeting, looking around - occurred during the two minutes’ silence. Royal Central summarised the Bozo faux pas.
“The commemorations didn’t get off to a good start for the Prime Minister when he was caught on camera looking around during the two minutes of silence with his unbuttoned coat flying in the wind … He then walked towards the Cenotaph too early and out of time, causing further criticism … However, the biggest mistake was when he laid his wreath at the base of the memorial upside down”. Maximum disrespect all round.
He looked like a mobile shambles, messed up his walk to lay the wreath, then laid it upside down. So where was the press condemnation this morning? Had Jezza done that, it would have been all over the front pages. But you know the answer already: on those front pages, there is not a word about it. Even though the press knew what he’d done.
For instance, Mail Online managed to tell readers “Awkward moment Boris Johnson sets off to lay his poppy wreath at the Cenotaph too early and has to make a hasty retreat”, although they missed the upside-down wreath laying and shambolic presentation. Free sheet Metro laid into both Bozo and Jezza: “Boris criticised for laying wreath upside down and Corbyn slammed for ‘tiny bow’”. But neither paper said anything this morning.
The Daily Brexit, still sometimes called the Express, also noticed: “Boris Johnson was left red-faced after he set off too early to lay his poppy wreath during the Remembrance Sunday ceremony at the Cenotaph. The Conservative leader was embarrassingly forced into a retreat after he recognised his mistake in front of national broadcasters. In another gaffe, Mr Johnson also appeared to lay his poppy wreath upside down in the Cenotaph”.
But no front page howling this morning. Instead, there is fulsome praise for claims that the economy is performing better. The Murdoch Sun has not mentioned Bozo’s gaffes at all, preferring to run wall-to-wall Tory propaganda instead.
The Bozo Cenotaph shambles encapsulates the sheer venality of our free and fearless press. It is airbrushing of reality that would have made the editors of Pravda and Isvestiya blush. And it demonstrates the challenge for Labour in the upcoming General Election.
We have a press desperate to put an inept, philandering, mendacious, bigoted, uncaring clown into Downing Street. Because he’s one of theirs. I’ll just leave that one there.
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