Dead Cats Won’t Save Bozo

As yesterday progressed, the right-leaning part of our free and fearless press, searching for something, anything, to take the heat off alleged Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson, unearthed not one, but two significantly sized dead cats. But alas, even they were not enough to distract from yet more allegations of improper partying.

James Slack, revolving door user supreme

First came the story of alleged Chinese spying. Labour MP Barry Gardiner was the name in the frame. But it did not take long for a photo to emerge of the alleged spy bending the ear of Young Dave, who, as he had been PM for six years, would have been rather more of a security risk. Hot on the heels of that setback came the claim that release of this information may not have been unconnected to the Home Secretary. A Bozo loyalist.

That loyalty is because Priti Patel owes her elevation to cabinet rank to Bozo. Any other occupant of 10 Downing Street would have her out of the Home Office sharpish. But there was still that second dead cat, the stripping of Royal titles from Prince Andrew. This was front page lead for the Super Soaraway Currant Bun. Which was not a coincidence.

How it works: now you see the lawbreaking ... 

Because last night came news of yet more of those drink-fuelled parties, one of them a leaving bash in the Number 10 basement, complete with DJ - the night before the Queen mourned alone in Windsor Castle’s St George’s Chapel, as part of a socially distanced funeral service for Prince Philip. Thus turning disrespect up to the max.

This, as with other lockdown-busting parties, has been kept off the front page of the Sun for one very good reason: the basement bash, along with the alleged suitcase full of alcoholic beverages from a nearby Co-Op which somehow evaded the scrutiny of the Metropolitan Police, was honouring the departure of one James Slack from his post as Downing Street Director of Communications - to become Sun deputy editor.

... but today you don't ...

And, in a routine display of double standards, the Sun kept schtum on lockdown-busting parties while, two months after Slack’s leaving bash, grassing up Matt Hancock for a clinch with Gina Coladangelo. There is no finer example in modern times of the power of the press resting not only on what it chooses to publish, but what it does not.

Sadly for Rupert Murdoch and his representative on earth, the twinkle-toed yet domestically combative Rebekah Brooks, their menu of selectively casting dead cats while indulging in unprincipled client journalism did not prevent the increasingly desperate and downmarket Telegraph, for reasons best known to itself, from turning on Bozo.

... because THIS

That move may have been prompted by news that some well-known Tory back benchers, notably Andrew “HS2 ate my homework” Bridgen, have also turned on the PM and are openly soliciting his departure from Downing Street. Perhaps, whisper it quietly, the Sundays may bring yet more bad Bozo news. Leaks of Sue Gray’s report suggest that a further dead cat is being readied. Another dead cat means another likely revelation.

It won’t save Bozo. But he will not go of his own volition: nor will Carrie. Both of them will have to be dragged out of Downing Street kicking and screaming, unwilling to depart from the centre of power that Bozo has sought for so long. The Tories have to act.

Meanwhile, Covid-19 claims another 335 lives. Not that press or Tories care, mind.

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