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Friday 14 January 2022

Dead Cats Won’t Save Bozo

As yesterday progressed, the right-leaning part of our free and fearless press, searching for something, anything, to take the heat off alleged Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson, unearthed not one, but two significantly sized dead cats. But alas, even they were not enough to distract from yet more allegations of improper partying.

James Slack, revolving door user supreme

First came the story of alleged Chinese spying. Labour MP Barry Gardiner was the name in the frame. But it did not take long for a photo to emerge of the alleged spy bending the ear of Young Dave, who, as he had been PM for six years, would have been rather more of a security risk. Hot on the heels of that setback came the claim that release of this information may not have been unconnected to the Home Secretary. A Bozo loyalist.

That loyalty is because Priti Patel owes her elevation to cabinet rank to Bozo. Any other occupant of 10 Downing Street would have her out of the Home Office sharpish. But there was still that second dead cat, the stripping of Royal titles from Prince Andrew. This was front page lead for the Super Soaraway Currant Bun. Which was not a coincidence.

How it works: now you see the lawbreaking ... 

Because last night came news of yet more of those drink-fuelled parties, one of them a leaving bash in the Number 10 basement, complete with DJ - the night before the Queen mourned alone in Windsor Castle’s St George’s Chapel, as part of a socially distanced funeral service for Prince Philip. Thus turning disrespect up to the max.

This, as with other lockdown-busting parties, has been kept off the front page of the Sun for one very good reason: the basement bash, along with the alleged suitcase full of alcoholic beverages from a nearby Co-Op which somehow evaded the scrutiny of the Metropolitan Police, was honouring the departure of one James Slack from his post as Downing Street Director of Communications - to become Sun deputy editor.

... but today you don't ...

And, in a routine display of double standards, the Sun kept schtum on lockdown-busting parties while, two months after Slack’s leaving bash, grassing up Matt Hancock for a clinch with Gina Coladangelo. There is no finer example in modern times of the power of the press resting not only on what it chooses to publish, but what it does not.

Sadly for Rupert Murdoch and his representative on earth, the twinkle-toed yet domestically combative Rebekah Brooks, their menu of selectively casting dead cats while indulging in unprincipled client journalism did not prevent the increasingly desperate and downmarket Telegraph, for reasons best known to itself, from turning on Bozo.

... because THIS

That move may have been prompted by news that some well-known Tory back benchers, notably Andrew “HS2 ate my homework” Bridgen, have also turned on the PM and are openly soliciting his departure from Downing Street. Perhaps, whisper it quietly, the Sundays may bring yet more bad Bozo news. Leaks of Sue Gray’s report suggest that a further dead cat is being readied. Another dead cat means another likely revelation.

It won’t save Bozo. But he will not go of his own volition: nor will Carrie. Both of them will have to be dragged out of Downing Street kicking and screaming, unwilling to depart from the centre of power that Bozo has sought for so long. The Tories have to act.

Meanwhile, Covid-19 claims another 335 lives. Not that press or Tories care, mind.

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Anonymous said...

Well, it was only a matter of time before the Chinese and Russians were wheeled out again. Goldstein in national garb(s).

And British mugs keep falling for it. While Murdoch/Rothermere are sniggering at them. And the useless twats at MI5 cover themselves in the usual tedious inglory.

Now, about those far right tory parties that "didn't happen" or were "misunderstood".....

Mr Larrington said...

Ladbrokes are saying it’s odds-on that Bloody Stupid Johnson won’t see out the year as PM, though I reckon he might hang on by his fingernails until the local elections give the party faithless an excuse to give him a boot up his outsized arse. They've got Rishi Sunak* at 15/8 favourite for his replacement, Cheesoid Truss at 4/1 and, er, Sir Keeves at 7/1.

* Which is an anagram of “Hi Risk Anus”

Anonymous said...

So, the Super Soaraway piling in on Prince Andy for 17 year old females? Seventeen, or to put it another way, one year older than the "Page Three Stunners".

Mark Howard said...

I sense a shifting of the the political tectonic plates. The next Tory leader must lance the boil of the ERG/Covid Recovery Group as Kinnock did with Momentum, although will probably face a similar fate.
Since the CRG rebellion, the Rees-Moggs etc believe they have free reign, appealing to the c100,000 party members but increasingly alienating UK voters. As with Johnson, any new leader will be in thrall to the CRG unless they call a GE and remove the whip, so they can't stand, as Johnson did with Tory moderates.
Johnson irretrievably lost any authority over his party with the CRG revolt against Plan B so was already a dead man walking. Even before 'party gate'.
Previous PMs have been able to turn their tenure into filthy lucre. This option is no longer open to Johnson as he has already rewarded his acolytes and will have no traction as a columnist, expert meeting chair or lobbyist and will become. effectively homeless, on loss of office. Even as an after-dinner speaker to software salesmen, his appeal as the 'dim-sounding-but-actually-very-clever' speaker will fail if just one person suffered a bereavement during lockdown.
Starmer must be hoping he'll cling on, with every PMQs 'he said this then, he said that then' which one is the truth? will resonate. Starmer has been collecting and collating receipts for 18 months now.
His awkward squad, (Corbynite/Momentum) is easier to control. Without the whip, Corbyn faces a future of cultivating his allotment while collecting his pension. While his wife would advocate this course, his lifetime of 'tilting against windmills' will probably mean him setting up his own party. Without the party whip he cannot stand as an MP. Membership or support for such a new party would mean expulsion from Labour/removal of whip for Starmer's awkward squad.
And then there is running a de facto 'progressive alliance' between Lib Dems and Labour where, as we have seen, there has already been an implicit pact in by-elections.

Anonymous said...

As Kinnock did with Momentum? Steady now, your prejudices are showing.

Rudolph the Red knows rein dear said...

Help stamp out free reign and restore free rein to its rightful place.

Pendragon said...

We keep being told about "civll servants" partying in Downing Street the night before the Duke of Edinburgh's funeral, as if they are impartial government employees put into jobs by the Civil Service Recruitment department.

Aren't these "civll servants" just Tory activists drafted into Downing Street to act as Johnson's staff, and employed as advisers and PR people? Allegra Stratton and James Slack were "civil servants" weren't they?

Anonymous said...

He can of course always lecture and after dinner speak on the further exploits of peppa pig or perhaps become a tour guide for Peppa Pig world.

Mick Kennedy said...

Will he and Carrie do a Trump and refuse to leave 'The Flat, or even squat No 10 claiming the kids will be homeless? Shurely not

Anonymous said...

Condenser of "Mark Howard":

More of the same old far right shite for ever and ever.

Thank me later.

Anonymous said...

I must say that "Mark Howard" sounds remarkably like that "Mark Hayhurst".

An astonishing coincidence.....

Mr Larrington said...

Since Neil Kinnock ceased to be leader of the Labour Party in 1992 and Momentum wasn’t founded until 2015…

Draclear said...

None of the news broadcasts I've seen that have mentioned the leaving-do party that took place the day before Prince Philip's funeral have seen fit to mention who the leaving do was for. Can't help but wonder why that is. I mean, for one thing, if journos want to know if it was a party and who was there, Slack would be the obvious chap to ask, him being in the same business and all that. First port of call, I'd have thought.
Unless maybe "The Sun" is saving it for one of its famous exclusives.
"Gotchus!" and maybe something about (metaphorically) pissing on the dead.

Anonymous said...

He meant Militant.

Anonymous said...

@ 20:23.

Yeah, just like he meant "Mark".

Funny how the "M" letter crops up. Like funny haha.

Next time he'll try a different letter. It's what trolls do.

Reggie_68 said...

As slack was Sunack best man, would sunack not at the party, he lives in the same building, surely he was at some of the parties? Just saying, I think he is being shielded