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Wednesday 4 September 2019

Dominic Cummings - Go Home, You’re Drunk

While his boss - that’s assuming that alleged Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson gives the orders, rather than taking them - was losing his first vote in the Commons last night, chief polecat Dominic Cummings was rather at a loose end. And it seems that, having so little to do, he then proceeded to the Rub-A-Dub, where he became Elephant’s Trunk and Mozart. Worse, everyone knew about it.
Cummings - soon to be Goings

The first danger signs came as the Guardian’s Peter Walker told “I just bumped into Dominic Cummings, who was clutching a glass of red wine and wandering along the parliamentary press corridor, lost and looking for a particular newspaper office. This is not a usual occurrence”. Looking for a news outlet to rant at? Then it got worse.
Polecat Dom somehow managed to stagger across to Portcullis House, where his meanderings passed before the inspection of the Sunday Times political editor Tim Shipman, who observed “Dominic Cummings just bumped into [Jeremy] Corbyn in Portcullis House and shouted ‘Come on Jeremy, let’s do this election, don’t be scared’. My spy says Corbyn was bundled away by horrified aides”.
That wasn’t quite how Labour’s Cat Smith saw it. “As one of several shadow cabinet members stood right next to Jeremy (who was on the phone at the time) I just thought there was some loud bloke who stunk of booze yelling at us”. So when Michael Rosen asked “Report that after Johnson lost, Dominic Cummings in corridor, drunk, yelling at Corbyn. True?”, the answer was, more or less, yes he was.
The response from other Tweeters was not exactly positive: “Thread for the ages, Dominic Cummings (you may know him from that Benedict Cumberbatch Brexit movie) is currently wandering about drunk and shouting at people” was one take. And there was more. “‘I just thought there was some loud bloke who stunk of booze yelling at us.’ This follows reports of Cummings wandering the corridors, red wine in hands. Seems he's a stroppy drunk who doesn't take defeat well. I'm sure he'll get used to it” was another.
The Tweeter known as BrexitBin noted “Cummings apparently got drunk on free wine last night and tried to goad Corbyn into calling a General Election. Drunk & disorderly in Westminster is a new low even for him. The way to beat these people is not to play their game. Put them under pressure and they crack”. Didn’t need much pressure, did it?
Meanwhile, the Mirror confirmedThe oddball strategist had previously been seen conspicuously prowling the corridors of the Commons press gallery, clutching a glass of red wine. And he unexpectedly attended a briefing of Lobby journalists earlier in the evening”. And the paper’s Kevin Maguire had more about the Polecat.
In his diary piece for the Staggers, he tells “Boris Johnson’s inner circle fear that Benedict Cumberbatch has gone to Dominic Cummings’s head and the crazed assassin’s inflated deceit would disrupt a complex general election. One No 10 staffer blamed setting the police on Sajid Javid’s adviser Sonia Khan - described as a fratricidal act when she’s a true Brextremist from the TaxPayers’ Alliance - on an increasingly Deranged Dom believing ‘his own propaganda’ since TV fame visited”. Not a good look.
Cummings is cracking up. Expect more pissed apparitions before he is taken away.
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Anonymous said...

What's the problem?

He's only behaving in accordance with standard far right Nastzi instructions.

It's only necessary to watch Bozo to see another example...all jabbing fingers, yelling, blustering bullshit and jumping up and down.

Wonderful stuff, if only because it exposes them for the utter political tramps they are.

Anonymous said...

Frit..surrenderbill....October 31st....surrenderbill......October 31st...frit, frit.....October 31st...leaving the EU...surrenderbill..big girl's blouse....surrenderfrit ..........

Can I be Prime Minister now, please?

Mark said...

I can't say this behaviour surprised me. When you consider that Boris is fond of a glass of red and an argument, I'd say they were a match made in heaven...or hell.

Unknown said...

That reminds me, can someone please tell me what on earth "frit" means outside of glassblowing?

Jonathan said...

As with all extremism, the human mind can only cope with it by getting bladdered or getting high, something which Hitler had to constantly do to rule during his murderous regime.

So Dom Cummings getting pissed, is probably the tip of the iceberg, psychopathy and substance misuse go hand in hand.

Andy McDonald said...

Lincolnshire slang, meaning afraid. Popularised by Thatcher.

Burlington Bertie from Bow said...


Thatcher called someone 'frit' years ago. It was claimed to be East
Anglian dialect for 'frightened, either Thatcher accidentally slipping into her pre-elocution/elevation tongue or intentionally trying to sound demotic. Johnson used it because he thought it would resonate with his Thatcher-worshipping base and stir something in the old men's loins.

Kev said...

A big up for the blinding in-depth coverage of the shenanigans going on in within out government at the moment. After perusing through the latest pile of poo from the number ten loo, I couldn't help wonder as you do...what happens to the puppet when the puppeteer pulls the strings, gets off his nut on a Dom Pom binge, just when you need him to tell you what to say and do?

Keep doing what your doing and at it. Someone's got to.



Kennerleigh.Heritage said...

The current triumvirate of BJ, JR-M and Mr Short Cummings make Succession TV series look like the Woodentops.