Master Cole says DO NOT LOOK AT THIS PHOTO
Master Cole is clearly in full agreement with the Mail’s line, which holds, more or less, that an unmarried man is undertaking some sort of less than savoury pastime when he dates women who are also unmarried, even if he does this one partner at a time, especially if the man in question then goes on to be well known. Regular Zelo Street readers may of course by this point have experienced a feeling of déjà vu.
“Well Justine’s interview went well” he declared, demonstrating the English language skills, or lack of them, that only a reassuringly expensive private boarding school can foster. Mil The Younger’s highly sound wife Justine Thornton had given an interview to the Mirror; the Mail then decreed that this heinous act meant that it was open season - or rather, an even more open season - on the Labour leader.
Having approved of Pierce being ordered over the top by his legendarily foul mouthed editor, Master Cole then set his spin cycle to automatic: “Paranoia sets in: ‘does anyone honestly believe these 2 papers independently decided to delve–ridiculously, cheaply–into EM's relationships’”. Yes, the disbelief that even the Mail could get that desperate, followed by the sound of derisive laughter, is, in Cole’s mind, “paranoia”.
Having gone wrong once, the flannelled fool then doubled down: “Evil right wing press conspiracy re Milibangs falls apart given it was Sindy's @JohnRentoul that fired starting gun”, he asserted. And, as Jon Stewart might have said, two things here. One, that sound of derision is still heading your way, and two, the only floating voters likely to be influenced by this drivel are going to vote, er, Labour as a result.
Can he get more desperate? You betcha, says Sarah: consider this Pony And Trap. “If Ed's wife is wheeled out to try humanise him and blabs off about secret lovers, you can't then complain about human interest follow up”. So, folks, mentioning that an unmarried bloke dates a woman is “human interest”. Master Cole might bear that in mind the next time he feels inclined to issue threats over his own relationships being mentioned.
Because you did, didn’t you, Hen? So when he says “The only person that made Ed's girlfriends an election issue was Ed's wife”, remember that the buffoon shooting his mouth off threatened legal action and played the victim when it was revealed that he was dating someone who worked at Tory HQ. You can see the full story HERE. And in the meantime, the Mail’s story is still the lamest of own goals.
The luverly lady pictured with H.Cole is Carrie Symonds of CCHQ...
It's worth mentioning that Justine *didn't*, in fact, make Ed's girlfriend any sort of issue at all. It's actually the Telegraph and Mail deliberately misinterpreting it.
If they'd read the original interview, what JM actually said was that she and Ed met at a party, she thought he was single, she liked him, they got talking, the convo didn't seem to go anywhere, it later turned out he was dating the hostess, and she was mad. They then met again a year later when both were single, and the rest is history.
That's not actually "fury" as the Mail portrays it - it's just perfectly reasonable irritation at having wasted an evening due to mixed communication. There's no 'secret girlfriend' or caddishness implied in that interview. Most normal people will have read her comments and taken them in the spirit they seem to have been intended - a wry joke. Then again, Harry Cole doesn't seem to be a normal person.
Woke up this morning
Hypocrite Harry Cole was on the news
Saying Justine M had made an election issue
Of Ed M's dating habits he accuse
But when it gets to Carrie
Harry's not so hot to expand
It's the CCHQ lady he's smooching
He's performing with the allinittogether band
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