Boris Admits He Is Seriously Overweight

A new promotional video has been produced by the Ministry of Propaganda, featuring yet another sympathetic and moving portrayal of The Great Leader as he proclaims to his obedient subjects the new fitness crusade upon which he exhorts us all to embark. The video is accompanied by suitably relaxing music, and the thought enters that it may also have had Carrie Symonds in close proximity, just to make sure.

Yes, alleged Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson has told his adoring public that they have to get fit. He does not, however, dwell on specifics, especially when it comes to the amount of extra poundage that he has been carrying around, and, whisper it quietly, still is carrying around. He confirms he is no taller than 5’ 10”, and that he has lost “at least a stone”, but we are not told from where he started.

Where that point might be, the Telegraph hinted at in June last year. “Boris Johnson has revealed that he put on weight again due to the relentlessness of the leadership campaign. Having previously lost 12 pounds in just two weeks after cutting out alcohol and ‘late night binges of chorizo and cheese’, Mr Johnson said he was now back up to ‘about 15 and a half [stone]’. However, he noted: ‘I was 16 and a half, so I’ve made progress.’”

After Bozo has his near-death experience with Covid-19, the Murdoch Times told readers “Obesity is blamed for Johnson’s coronavirus suffering … Boris Johnson was so badly affected by coronavirus because he is ‘significantly’ overweight, a doctor said yesterday. Aseem Malhotra, a cardiologist, said that risk of death from the disease increased ten-fold if the patient is obese”. Again, the 16 and a half stone figure is mentioned.

How overweight is that? Well, I’m taller than Bozo - but not by very much - and tip the scales at twelve and a half stones. I am overweight, but not by very much. The PM, when he was hospitalised, weighed probably four stones more, or 56 pounds if you prefer. Not only was he seriously overweight, losing a stone of that means he is still seriously overweight. Which may explain the less than total candour of the latest video.

Note also that, although he claims to be going out for early morning runs, he is not depicted running. Worse, the exhortation to get fit does not sit well with what his next door neighbour in Downing Street has just done: Chancellor of the Exchequer Rishi Sunak has launched the “Eat out to help out” campaign, which gives money off, er, fast food, among other restaurant offerings. Mixed messages not addressed by that video.

None of which has been picked up by a compliant press, which has taken Bozo’s “Losing weight is hard but with some small changes we can all feel fitter and healthier. If we all do our bit, we can reduce our health risks and protect ourselves against coronavirus - as well as taking pressure off the NHS” and run with it, the Evening Standard being typical.

So nobody is making the obvious point: Boris Johnson talks the talk, gets his propaganda into the papers, the broadcasters pick it up and amplify it, his fans duly fawn over his efforts, but no-one does their sums and points out that he is still seriously overweight.

Media fails to do its job once again, film at 11. I’ll just leave that one there.

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