Morgan McSweeney - The New Polecat

It was not so long ago that now disgraced former alleged Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson was in 10 Downing Street, and his chief advisor was one Dominic Cummings. He was the Original and Genuine Polecat, a fount of megalomania, who knew more about everything and anything than anyone else, because they were all poo holes.

And what happened next was with the inevitability of night following day: in late 2020, even Bozo had had enough of his chief advisor and de facto chief of staff, and out went the Polecat, to the relief of many in and around Government who wished it had happened rather earlier. But that was then, and now we have another Polecat in Downing Street.

Moreover, we have another Polecat whose sense of self-awareness appears to have been surgically removed somewhere along the way: step forward Morgan McSweeney, the completion of whose ascension to undisputed chief Polecat has now been confirmed, perhaps unintentionally, by Pippa Crerar of the Guardian, as yet more of The Great Man’s thoughts are churned over.

McSweeney was “preparing to make ‘radical changes’ to the Downing Street operation … No 10 sources said that ‘nothing was off the table’ when it came to ensuring the machinery of government was fit for purpose, heralding a slew of changes that could reshape the Downing Street organisation”. And who is the source of this word salad, which tells us precisely Sweet Jack?

But there is more. “This could include recasting different teams inside No 10, resolving the pay dispute with special advisers and further bolstering the political side of the operation with more appointments. McSweeney would also take a more data-led approach to decision-making, sources said”. Ooh yes, a data driven approach will get the Daily Mail back in its box. Not.

Have another go. “‘The day-to-day machinery of government doesn’t work properly. Morgan has a different view on how to do things. He’s nothing if not the agent of change,’ said one senior source … ‘He will have to be radical. Nothing is off the table. We’re expected to be running a powerful G7 economy yet sometimes it’s all quite small and analogue. There has to be a better way of doing things.’” More word salad. Which conveys zero information.

Then come the first signs of megalomania. “Downing Street insiders played down the prospect of an imminent cabinet reshuffle despite reports that McSweeney could push for one … [McSweeney] is expected to attend cabinet on Tuesday”. And just exactly who voted for the SOB?

Having shat all over Sue Gray, after shitting all over the previous Labour leadership, McSweeney now has to shift to delivering, organising, and indeed taking responsibility. Schmoozing the Guardian is still in vogue with him, it seems, but he never did kill The Canary. Worse for him, the right-wing press has him in its sights. Titles like the Mail will have him for breakfast.

And that is no matter how hard he tries to shit on others to take the heat off himself, meaning, for bingo card holders, seeing which cabinet ministers are suddenly and inexplicably being briefed against, in the same way that Ms Gray and indeed Jezza were briefed against. Letting him attend Cabinet is a sign of hopeless weakness by Keir Starmer. He will come to regret it.

Behold the new Polecat. Worryingly similar to the old Polecat.

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