The Super Soaraway Currant Bun is tucked away behind a paywall, but a Zelo Street regular has helpfully scanned some of yesterday’s paper (see how that works, Rupe?). A perusal of the dubiously researched copy shows that, just as one might have thought (thankfully) former Tory MP Louise Mensch could not say anything more stupid, she has once again outdone herself.
(c) Doc Hackenbush 2014
In another display that suggests we should be deeply sceptical of the abilities of back-benchers on both sides of the Commons, Ms Mensch proclaims “Juncker’s off his Ed if he thinks he will defeat Dave”. Yes, she believes that any renegotiation of the UK’s arrangement with the EU means Young Dave and European Commission (EC) President-elect Jean-Claude Juncker will be facing off against one another.
And, as Captain Blackadder might have observed, there was only one thing wrong with this idea – it was bollocks. What might be discussed in a renegotiation will not involve the EC President. It will involve the representatives of the member states. So when she says “Juncker is playing a high stakes game of chicken with David Cameron”, this is baloney. He hasn’t even taken over the Presidency yet!
She talks of “Juncker’s hardline federalist policies”, but his personal politics and policies are irrelevant. It is the European Parliament (EP) that votes through, or votes down, legislation. Does Ms Mensch know anything about what goes on in Brussels? That is in serious doubt, as witness “Juncker wants to block Cameron’s restrictions on Euro migrants”. As far as is known, he hasn’t uttered a word on the subject!
Winner of no prizes at all for fiction
And, as the man said, there’s more: “This is a cornerstone of renegotiation [says who?] and Juncker has no say in the matter [so why pitch his name in the first place?]. If Cameron can do a deal with Germany, so-called ‘free movement’ WILL stop”. What planet is she on? Angela Merkel has said that Free Movement is not up for negotiation. Doesn’t the Sun have her column reality checked?
Finally comes an absolute pearler: “Juncker and his Euro morons think they can demand an extra £1.7 billion of the Chancellor’s hard-saved cash. All this is political”. Er, hello? Someone who has not yet taken over the Presidency is able to influence the EU budget mechanism already? And save us the “hard-saved” Party Political Propaganda, Ms M., we’re borrowing more than ever right now.
Ms Mensch seems to have missed that the budget adjustment is part of a process that the UK voted for. The Presidency has no say in the matter. Louise Mensch has no room to call “morons” on anyone else: not only does she know diddly squat about how the EU functions, she also can’t be arsed finding out.
And just remember, she was allowed to stand as an MP and sit on the DCMS Select Committee. Don’t trust your elected representatives – they may be equally stupid.