Simon Danczuk Is A Wanker

Rochdale’s still nominally Labour MP Simon Danczuk is back in the news again, and as so often, for all the wrong reasons. In three nuggets of news this week, Spanker Si has come across as not really the kind of person who any political party would want representing them, or even being a member. And one developing story may put an end to his political career once and for all. But the first news is about expenses.

Danczuk was - not for the first time - on holiday at his “gaff” in Algorfa after the last General Election, and had to fly back to London to be sworn in. He paid just over £186 for a flight from Alicante to London’s Gatwick airport - and then billed the taxpayer for it. To no surprise at all, the claim has now been disallowed and Spanker has had to pay it back. One has to marvel at the brass neck of claiming it in the first place.

From there, things went - literally - down the pan as it was revealed that Danczuk is getting his name on part of a school in the Gambia - but not in the way he might have wanted. After he had put in a significant amount of work for a book on Cyril Smith, and was then cut out of the exercise, John Walker suggested to Danczuk that as a compromise the MP might make a donation to a school he supports in the Gambia.

Seems he really was Punishing Percy in the Palm

Danczuk stonewalled, as Zelo Street regulars will recall. So Walker approached Iain Dale, who had published the book which Danczuk and his then side-kick Matt Baker had produced, and Dale agreed to make a donation of £250 to the school. This money will go towards refurbishment of the toilet block, which will then be named after the MP whose lack of generosity failed to pay for any of it. The Simon Danczuk toilet block.

Can it get any worse for Spanker Si? It certainly could: after Zelo Street published a number of images of Danczuk he had sent to a former girlfriend, and wondered if he might be, er, stimulating himself by hand in some of them, Popbitch has picked up on a story in which someone is trying to interest the Sun newspaper.

Another unscheduled washing of the bed linen

“More Danczuk content coming soon” tells the site, before explaining with less than total subtlety “Spanky Spunky Si has been sending videos of him pleasuring himself to ex girlfriends, despite requests from them not to. The Sun is interested”. The photo linked from the article is one of those previously published by this blog. So it seems that Spanker was indeed stimulating himself by hand. And it got worse.

Zelo Street contacted someone with reliable knowledge of matters Danczuk for comment. While the source chose to remain tight-lipped (if not ashen-faced), there was no denial of the Popbitch claim. So it only remains to see whether the Murdoch doggies are prepared to, er, stand this one up as hard news in order to prove that Spanker Si is still a Coming Man, even if he is just combining wire-twanging and log-flogging.

Not only is Simon Danczuk an expenses cheat, a drunkard, a sex pest, a serial liar and a hermetically tight miser, he’s now officially a wanker as well. What a clown.