Carole Malone Easter Ban ISN’T

Another public holiday of Christian tradition, another lame attempt by bad faith actors in and around our free and fearless press to talk well, but lie badly, about how the Rotten Lefties™, Scary Muslims™, and of course the hated BBC, are somehow “Cancelling Christianity”. Yes, Easter is being systematically wiped out! Except that this is total horseshit.

Carole Malone

At the increasingly desperate and downmarket Telegraph, Christopher “No” Hope told that “BBC ‘abandons Christianity’ after dropping traditional Easter service broadcast”, only for someone on Twitter, X, or whatever Muskrat’s calling it this week, to add “The BBC is showing on its main channel a full Easter service from Canterbury Cathedral on Easter Sunday”.

But the idiot who wants people to call him “Chopper” (is he a fan of young peoples’ cycles from days gone by?) has served up a mere Hors d’Oeuvres for a rather more pungent Entrée brought forth by the appallingly batshit Carole Malone over at the Daily Brexit, still called the Express, where someone calling themselves a journalist has done very little journalism.

Teased from the Express’ front page as “Why are we forever apologising for wishing Happy Easter”, and with the Dan Hodges-inspired absent question mark, the supporting article bears very little resemblance to reality, to which seasoned Malone observers may shrug and reply “no change there, then”.

Off she goes: “I still 100 per cent believe in, and live by, the principles of my religion. But what I see is that Christian traditions - like Easter - are being wrapped up and sold as ‘all-inclusive events’ [no citation], with the Christianity part phased out because it’s somehow become an irrelevance, or worse, an embarrassment [no citation]. There’s no respect for Christianity any more [no citation]”. Would Madam care to stop generalising and lie more specifically?

She certainly would. “We’re not allowed to call Christmas Christmas in case it offends other religions”. Bullshit. Jesus of Nazareth is an important prophet to Muslims, for instance. But do go on. “Nativity plays are renamed ‘winter celebrations’”. This refers to a hearsay claim from 2014 by “Parents on Netmums”. The BBC report of the unsubstantiated claims can be read HERE.

And, sadly, there is more. “Why the hell are we forever apologising for [Christmas and Easter] and trying to dress them up as something else?” We’re not. Have another go. “This week, we’ve seen stories about shops calling Easter eggs ‘gesture eggs’ to be ‘inclusive’”. The Beeb report hasn’t got a photo of that. And the “to be ‘inclusive’” is just another false assumption.

Worse for Ms Malone, not that she’ll take any notice of it, was Snopes taking the claim “In March 2024, the British candy manufacturer Cadbury renamed its chocolate Easter eggs ‘gesture eggs’” and declaring it FALSE. And her claim “We have Iceland replacing the crosses on Hot Cross Buns with a tick” is a flat-out lie: no replacement has taken place. Then it gets worse.

“It’s no wonder church congregations are dwindling if children aren’t being taught about Christian traditions. I’m guessing there are children who believe Easter is just about holidays and chocolate eggs”. She said it! Chocolate Eggs! Instead of Easter Eggs! But seriously, she knows what the problem is.

Yes, it’s Scary Muslims™! “The point about the Islamic faith is that its followers are fervent. They protect it. They refuse to have it disrespected. But Christians aren’t doing any of that any more, because they’ve been made to feel Christianity is a ‘white’ outmoded institution [no citation], which is maybe why it’s being systematically phased out”. That’s a straight-A Fuck Right Off. No-one, but no-one, is systematically or otherwise phasing out Christianity.

Anyhoo, do we get a rousing peroration? Er, “I said at the start I don’t go to church every Sunday but I am a Christian and I demand the right to have my religion respected along with everyone else’s, and I resent those meddlers who think it’s OK to phase out or tamper with my beliefs”. But no-one is tampering with her beliefs. So this article didn’t need to be written.

Except to scare her target audience by lying. And that’s not good enough.

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