Putin - Worst Bond Villain Ever

There were so many executions of insufficiently loyal subordinates to choose from: Number 9 being fatally electrocuted and Count Lippe dispatched by a passing motorcyclist in Thunderball, all those executed by Mr Wint and Mr Kidd in Diamonds are Forever, and of course the scientists whose helicopter was blown out of the sky in The Spy Who Loved Me. Remember that one.

A plane crash ... most unfortunate

Yes, bad Bond villains and their gratuitous murder of anyone they decided may not be conducive to whatever evil project they had embarked on were a feature of the franchise. But they were not happening in the real world, you understand: it was mere exaggeration just to show the viewer how ruthless 007’s latest adversary was prepared to be. Until this week in Russia.

As the BBC has reported, “Russian mercenary leader Yevgeny Prigozhin was on the passenger list of a jet which crashed in Russia killing all 10 people on board, Russia's civil aviation authority says”. And what might have caused the aircraft to crash? “Social media linked to the Wagner mercenary group say his private plane was shot down by Russian air defences”.

We are also reminded that “Prigozhin led an aborted mutiny against Russia's armed forces in June”. So who was on board? “Prigozhin's aircraft - an Embraer-135 (EBM-135BJ) - was flying from Moscow to St Petersburg on Wednesday with seven passengers and three crew, Russia's Rosaviatsia aviation authority said … Senior Wagner commander Dmitry Utkin - who founded the group in 2014 - was also on the passenger list, it said”.

Shoot-down or something else? “Grey Zone said local residents had heard two bangs before the crash and had seen two vapour trails … The aircraft had been in the air for less than half-an-hour”. There is also video showing the aircraft on fire and out of control before it crashed.

The Beeb has also told us “several Russia watchers have described him as a ‘dead man walking’ since the mutiny … President Putin's initial reaction to his challenge to Russia's defence establishment was vitriolic, calling it a betrayal and a stab in the back in a video message on 24 June”. Vladimir Vladimirovich has previously said one thing he will not forgive is betrayal.

This organisation does not tolerate betrayal

So what did Vlad have to say about the hit, sorry, crash? “Regarding this plane crash … first and foremost, I would like to express my sincere condolences to the families of all those who died. These matters are always a tragedy. Indeed, if the initial data are correct, then those who were on board included employees of the Wagner Group”. Like he didn’t know beforehand.

Do go on. “I would like to emphasise that these are people who made a significant contribution to our common cause of fighting the neo-Nazi régime in Ukraine. We remember this, we know it, and we won’t forget it. Prigozhin I’ve known for a long time, since the early 1990s. He was a man of complicated fate, and he made serious mistakes in his life”.

Like being on board that aircraft when it just happened to fall out of the sky, on fire, and out of control. But don’t worry, “the head of the investigative committee reported on this to me this morning. They’ve already begun a preliminary investigation into this incident [incident, not accident]. It will be conducted in full and seen through to the end”. Yeah, right.

The US has already decided that the aircraft was brought down by what Chief Inspector Clouseau of the Sureté would have called A Beumb. More importantly, those in and around the Wagner Group have decided that It Was Vlad Who Ordered The Hit and have vowed revenge. Byline Times has more.

Their article on the crash and what comes next notes “Putin’s reign is characterised by the violent deaths of critics, dissidents, journalists, opposition leaders, rebellious oligarchs, and organised crime group members”, and adds that the hit may have been “timed to send a message to the Russian elite in anticipation of the forthcoming 2024 elections”.

May get nasty if he loses his grip, mind. Or suddenly becomes unwell.

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