Don’t Menshn Boris

As I pointed out yesterday, the announcement by London’s increasingly occasional Mayor Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson that he would campaign for Britain to leave the EU was deliberately and cynically timed to maximise the front page press coverage he would receive this morning. And, exactly as the fraudulently cynical Bozza would have wished, his press pals queued up to pay homage to his opportunism.

(c) Doc Hackenbush 2014

But elsewhere, there was the distinctive screeching of yet another U-Turn as one pro-am motormouth decided that her labelling of Bozza as a no-hope Europhile was not quite right. Yes, (thankfully) former Tory MP Louise Mensch was getting her excuses ready. But the litany of damage was there for all to see.

That is because she had spent the best part of two years slagging him off: “Boris cannot lead the Parliamentary party. They will not follow a Europhile. On principle”. Yeah, Boo Boris! Boo!! Young Dave, on the other hand, was much more to her taste: “Cam not Europhile at all. Moderate sceptic”. Yes, well. And there was more.

He had no power base in the party, you see: “People focus too much on Europhile Boris with no support among Tory MPs. Sajiid rise meteoric, also fresh sign of Osborne strength”. Also Bozza would be no good for party unity: “Boris is a Europhile. Would split party top to toe”. Well, the Tories are split like that right now - but it’s not down to Bozza.

She even took time out to lecture the serially clueless Tim Montgomerie, making sure he knew that he was wrong and she was right: “you are literally the only journalist I know who does not consider Boris a Europhile”. Monty protested that she was just attacking Bozza. “I don't attack him, I say he is a rabid Europhile. That is factual. Your denial of it is preposterous”. No room for misunderstanding there, then.

EVEN EARLIER THIS MONTH Ms Mensch was telling anyone not yet asleep that Bozza was out of it: “Boris has shown his Europhile colours and will never be Prime Minister. He's done”. JUST THREE DAYS AGO she anointed her own rising star: “Boris is a committed europhile. Sajid will be for #Brexit and for @vote_leave”.

And then came the realisation that she had been wrong: wrong about Cameron, wrong about Bozza, and wrong about Sajid Javid. That’s a spectacularly wrong headed performance, even for her. What to do? “No question, however, that if my two Tory heroes of the economy Osborne and Javid back Remain and Boris backs Leave, he will be PM”. What about “cannot lead”, “no support”, and “will never be Prime Minister”? Too late for any of that - it was time to celebrate the Rapture: “BORIS BACKS BREXIT”.

So all that slagging off can be forgotten, and Bozza is the most wonderful thing since the last wonderful thing nominated by upmarket Manhattan’s most inept pundit. And remember, folks - they allowed her to become an MP.