Ryanair - Just Don’t Say MAX

One subject that has faded from view over time, and which has the potential to affect many Brits going off on their hols this Summer, is the saga of the Boeing 737 MAX, the aircraft type that was grounded worldwide after two of them performed what is euphemistically termed a controlled flight into terrain, though it was not those on the flight deck exercising the control.

Now redeeming itself with an airline near you

Now, 346 deaths, Boeing and the FAA having done the walk of shame for their failings, and a redesign so that the 737 MAX’s Manoeuvring Characteristics Augmentation System (or MCAS) can’t routinely stuff an aircraft into the ground later, the plane is in service worldwide - including with budget carrier Ryanair. So how are they selling the MAX to their punters?

That thought entered last Friday after passengers for the 1710 flight from Manchester to Lisbon had been allowed out of their Terminal 3 gate to line up by the aircraft. So there I was, standing by the port side engine, and thinking that the intake was not only larger than on an 800 series 737, but circular, unlike the flat-bottomed nacelle to give the CFM56 enough ground clearance.

It was mounted higher than on the 800 series, and cantilevered further forward too. Hmmm, I thought, this is a MAX, isn’t it? Then another difference, the usual 13 steps up from tarmac to cabin using the aircraft’s internal stairs was now 14 steps. Snazzy rotating overhead luggage bins too, a feature borrowed from the DreamLiner. Let’s look at the safety card.

With Ryanair, the flight safety card, rather like the carrier itself, is right in your face. And it has to tell you what type of aircraft it is. So how do they avoid the moment when one half of the passengers starts up with the bad taste air crash jokes, thus ensuring they spend the flight scaring the shit out of the other half of the passengers? Simples. They don’t mention the M-Word.

“Boeing 737-8200”, it says. And, technically, this is correct. Michael O’Leary and his pals get around introducing the 737 MAX to their route network by not saying the dreaded word. They have figured - correctly - that the vast majority of their punters won’t immediately Google “Boeing 737-8200” as soon as they see the safety card. They’re not interested. Out of sight, out of mind.

Only two previous crashes, don't worry about it

Most passengers might notice the new luggage bins, but not realise what that means. They won’t find the very different engine note during the take-off run - more of a whistle than a drone - to be anything exceptional. Which means that whoever at Ryanair decided not to use the M-Word made the correct call. The plane did the job, the flight was uneventful. Fair play to them.

After all, the 180 or so passengers had other priorities: whether the authorities in Lisbon would allow UK passport holders to use their E-Gates (they did), getting through Terminal 1 arrivals (lots of walking), figuring out the ticket machines at the Metro station, getting downtown, finding hotels and AirBnBs, and venturing out for late food and drinks across the great city.

Those with longer memories might recall that the Airbus A320 family - the 737’s greatest rival - began its service life with some unwelcome headline bad publicity after an Air France crew managed to drop one of the aircraft in a wooded area near Mulhouse-Habsheim airport during an air show. Why I won’t go near Air France, take 94. The planes have done better since then.

The point is straightforward: modern air travel is safe, as safe as decades of learning the lessons can make it. Cars, vans and lorries crash, the mess is swept up, the road is mended and hosed down, and all continues rather as before. A passenger aircraft crashes, the investigators arrive and carry on working until they figure out what happened. Then come the actions.

Perhaps whole fleets of planes are grounded. Corrective action is implemented. Procedures for maintenance, preparation, training and control are updated. Yes, with the 737 MAX, Boeing and the FAA loused up big time, but again, the lessons were ultimately learned - so much so that most of those on flight FR2252 last Friday wouldn’t have noticed much had changed.

Why trains and planes are safer than you think. Whoever the carrier.

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