Why Bozo Fever Is A No-No

The goldfish bowl of Westminster politics seems to have induced goldfish-like memory spans in some of its observers: one look at today’s front pages shows that the right-leaning part of our free and fearless press has not only forgotten its complicity in installing the disaster that was Liz Truss, but it has also forgotten just why there had to be a change of leader in the first place.

Amid growing calls for a General Election, driven partly by Ms Truss having junked so many of the Tories’ 2019 manifesto commitments, and partly by the inability of the Tories to actually govern, the question was straightforward enough: what would a sensible and rational political party have done? What would a reality based party have done? What would Nietzsche have done?

Sadly, all too many of the Tories’ MPs, hangers-on and press allies do not inhabit such a lofty intellectual plain. So it is that the Daily Mail has thundered “BORIS v RISHI: FIGHT FOR SOUL OF THE TORIES”. The increasingly desperate and downmarket Telegraph offers “Boris Johnson tells Tories: I can save party from election wipeout”. The Murdoch Sun claims “BOJO: I’LL BE BACK”, and the Daily Brexit, still called the Express, asks “HE COULDN’T COULD HE … WILL BORIS BOUNCE BACK TO No 10?”

None of these less than august organs manages equal prominence for the mildly inconvenient fact that disgraced former alleged Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson is at present on yet another holiday, this time in the Caribbean, when he should be serving his constituents and lending his support to his party by bothering to turn up to the Commons.

Nor do they manage to explain why someone who was forced out in disgrace not so long ago should be allowed anywhere near the levers of power, such is the appetite among the client journalist and courtier establishment to elevate one of their own to the Top Job. The game of Fantasy PM combines with the herd instinct and inconvenient reality goes out the window.

Why that reality matters was hinted at by LBC host James O’Brien, who mused “The list of things that people agitating for Johnson's return clearly don't care about is incredible when you think about [it]: corruption, law-breaking, cronyism, avoidable deaths, bullying, lying, rule-breaking, Russian spies, ethical breaches, trashing parliamentary standards etc”.

James Doleman had a few specifics as to why Bozo left the first time. “Sections of the media may have forgotten Boris Johnson had to resign for covering up for a sex offender then lying about it. I doubt most of the public have”. Also, there was the illegal proroguing of Parliament, which involved misleading The Queen, then trying to rewrite the rules to protect another disgraced Tory MP, Owen Paterson. Then came the standards committee.

As Josiah Mortimer, whose usual beat is covering London Mayoral politics, put it, “Privileges committee insider tells The Sun that No 10’s *own evidence* handed to the privileges committee is so damning it is likely to lead to a Commons suspension of the person leading the leadership race by some counts: Boris Johnson”. And, most likely, a recall by-election. In Uxbridge and South Ruislip. Which Bozo would be highly likely to lose.

What’s the investigation about? As Left Foot Forward has put it, Bozo “is currently under investigation over whether he misled MPs over the partygate scandal, after he insisted no rules were broken”. In other words, it’s about him allegedly lying to Parliament. And talking of Bozo having a succession of trouser igniting moments, Peter Oborne has reminded us that there is more.

His article chronicling Bozo’s lies, which only goes up to May this year, tells with some restraint of “A list of misleading statements made by Prime Minister Boris Johnson in the House of Commons which remain uncorrected on the official record in defiance of the Ministerial Code”. There are more than 60 instances of Bozo lying to the Commons. And some Tories want him back.

In 2019, trust in the UK’s written press had fallen to 15%. One look at those Mail, Telegraph, Sun and Express front pages tells you how that has come about. Bozo may be an SOB, but he’s their SOB. Meanwhile, the electorate knows that he’s a shameless and unprincipled liar, a workshy sponger, a sexually incontinent charlatan who is far less nice than he looks.

Why might all those foreigners be laughing at the UK? You might wish to ask that. I couldn’t possibly comment.

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