Iain Duncan Cough Objects To Himself

Negotiations between the UK and EU delegations continue, but little progress is being made, despite Ron Hopeful at the Daily Brexit, still called the Express, telling readers this morning “Brexit: EU ready to cave in over deal”. But at least alleged Prime Minister Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson can count on the unswerving support of Tory MPs, even if the logic gymnastics required are becoming all too obvious.

One who is always rather too obvious for his limited intellectual horizons is former Tory leader Iain Duncan Cough, who previously told the Commons “There is a lot about the withdrawal agreement that I do not like … However, if we do not go forward to consider the Bill, we will rue this day because we will end up having to accept what I believe will be a damaging and destructive extension … this is now the only way”.

In case anyone didn’t get that, the relevant passages from Hansard are reproduced on his website under the heading “IAIN DUNCAN SMITH OUTLINES HIS REASONING FOR BACKING THE WITHDRAWAL AGREEMENT”. He backed the WA. But now he doesn’t.

So yesterday afternoon came the combination of Damascene Conversion and screeching U-Turn: “Whilst the UK wants to have a good trade relationship with the EU as a sovereign state, the EU has different ideas. They want our money and they want to stop us being a competitor. The Withdrawal Agreement (WA) we signed last year sadly helps them”.

It does? Do go on. “To avoid their own budget black hole, the EU gets £39billion as a ‘divorce payment’ from us, reflecting our share of the current EU budget. But it gets worse. Buried in the fine print, unnoticed by many, is the fact we remain hooked into the EU’s loan book”. Unnoticed by Himself Personally Now. So what’s the problem?

“You can't be half in the EU & half out, the problem is the WA. It costs too much & it denies us true national independence. This WA giving the EU future control over us has to go. Now Britain faces a £160billion #EU loans bill AFTER #Brexit”. Sadly, his citation is an article in the Murdoch Sun that admits the UK’s liability for future investment projects “could translate into £160billion of unpaid loans”. COULD. MIGHT. MAYBE. OR NOT.

This combination of spin, smear and buyer’s regret won him few friends, with initial responses ranging from “You signed it, you twat”, or just “you signed it”, to “You're an MP. You had a responsibility to read it” and “Should have gone to Specsavers”.

Jim Cognito added “Iain Duncan Smith showing Iain Duncan Smith up to be the sort of moron most people know Iain Duncan Smith is”, while the Spiller of Tea mused “When your amazing oven-ready deal turns out to be 7kg of semtex and dogshit moulded into the shape of a chicken”. Swindon for Europe attempted to sum up the situation.

“Iain Duncan Smith MP has finally got around to reading the Withdrawal Agreement 8 months after voting for it, and 9 months after insisting that 3 days was enough time to read and debate it, and finds that he disagrees with it”. Meanwhile, Jo Maugham mused “Fair play, I think, to Iain Duncan Smith for coming out so clearly and saying the deal his boss signed is dreadful for the country. I doubted he had it in him. Guess I was wrong”.

Is Bozo The Clown the Tories’ worst ever leader? Duncan Cough suggests not.

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