Farage Wipes Out UKIP

The Brexit Party is dead, long live the Brexit Party: while Nigel “Thirsty” Farage is feted by the more easily impressed part of our free and fearless press, once more winning a contest where he knows he will never have to deliver on his braggadocio, he has at least performed one welcome service. He has ensured the destruction of UKIP as a political force, thus demonstrating that it’s all about Himself Personally Now.

I em not a racialist but, und zis is a big but ...

The roll-call of those thus removed from the body politic is a relief to those who wished it had happened rather earlier: Adolf von Batten, the party leader with all the charisma of Arthur Putey, his deputy Mike Hookem, useful in the wrong kind of fight, and hopefuls such as Carl Benjamin, who styles himself Sargon of Akkad, along with Mark Meechan, who styles himself Count Dankula. All are now electoral history.

No more dogs making Nazi salutes ...

The problem is that the former Farage Falange has been replaced by another in the same mould, the new incarnation of his electoral vehicle being less democratic - as in not democratic at all - and with a roster of MEPs who, let us not drive this round the houses for too long, are not fit to shovel human by-product from Heap A to Heap B.

... one fewer milkshake targets ...

The all-new Brexit Party has no policies, other than the hardest Brexit possible, which Nige need not waste time explaining, because he’s won, see? He need not tell his adoring fans that the only policy he offers is likely to make him and his pals a lot richer, and the folks who voted him back into power a lot poorer. Right now, they don’t care. They backed a winner, everyone else lost, ha ha ha, get over it.

... but we still have Squeaky con-man finger up the bum time

So right now it is a challenging task to get those voters to respond to the obvious questions - how will Brexit benefit them? What is it that they so dislike about the EU? What EU laws would they repeal? What do they think “No Deal” means? What is so “undemocratic” about the EU? Do they know who they just voted into office?

Because, whether or not those voters want to respond right now, they will have to do so in the future, perhaps after the event. And that’s the greatest pity: it will be too late when the deed is done, manufacturing industry is leaving the UK, Sterling has become a basket case currency, wages have not just stagnated but declined, the NHS has become history, and the UK has become a subservient client state of the USA.

Only then will some of the most ardent Farage fans stop, think, and realise they’ve been had. By then, Nige will have retired to his secure villa, happy in the knowledge that he broke the old politics, but sadly, broke his own country in doing so. But it won’t be his fault. As Carole Cadwalladr put it, “The idea that the Brexit Party is a ‘new’ party is a total fiction. It’s just the latest host body for Farage - the tapeworm of British politics”.

Yes, it’s good to see Batten and the Islamophobic fringe finally crash out of politics. Sadly, the sick joke that is Nige the Pied Piper rolls right on, peddling lie after lie after lie, offering voters a prospectus on which he will never have to deliver, selling a vision of a future Britain he knows is fantasy, and accountable to no-one but himself.

Worst of all, that free and fearless press still can’t bother itself to hold the charlatan to account. Buckle up, Britain. It’s going to be a bumpy ride.

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