The Sun - A Whites-Only Paper

Just to show its sincere remorse for its coverage of the Hillsborough stadium disaster, the Super Soaraway Currant Bun has re-hired disgraced former editor Kelvin MacKenzie to spew out a twice-weekly column laced with intolerance and even the occasional excursion across the racism line, just so readers of A Certain Age can re-live the days when the Murdoch press cared even less about people who were not white.

Sometimes the racism is subtle, but yesterday Kel just had to come straight out with it: “Don’t waste time frisking me as white (and older) guys are not the terrorists”. Wait, what? All is then explained: “Kelvin MacKenzie bites back at some pointless airport security checks”. Kel is not pleased at having to be treated like other passengers, then.

How did the poor dear come to have to undergo this ordeal? “JUST spent a very enjoyable week on the Indian Ocean island of Mauritius, which is basically the Caribbean with nicer locals and no holes in the road, although I suspect only the brains behind the Hatton Garden heist can afford to stay there”. Listen up, he’s got LOADS OF MONEY!

And then it all goes wrong: “on the return leg I have to switch planes at Dubai before heading on to London. As I’m just about to board the plane, I am stopped by a polite security guard who asks to look into my bag”. And? “If security were really interested in stopping an outrage why would they waste their time on me? A quick glance at the photo at the top of this page would reveal two things that would tell the Dubai authorities that I was not going to be a terrorist. The first is my age and the second is my colour”.

And then he comes straight out with it: “Racial profiling is an uncomfortable subject but everybody knows - especially the nervous employees at Dubai airport - that if a bomb is to be smuggled on to a plane it will be carried on by a Muslim from the Middle East or Africa”.

Do they now. Was Anders Breivik a Muslim? How about Timothy McVeigh? If we’re talking about bringing down airliners, perhaps Kelvin McFilth would like to suggest that the captain of the USS Vincennes was a follower of The Prophet (the ship shot down an Iranian airliner over the Strait of Hormuz in 1988, with 290 fatalities)?

How about the Brigate Rosse? The Baader-Mainhof gang? ETA? The provisional IRA and its various splinter groups and successors? What about Eugène Terre’Blanche and the AWB? The less than transparent behaviour of the Russian security agencies, which may have included bombing airliners in order to pin the blame on others? Perhaps Kel has forgotten the case of Nezar Hindawi?

Hindawi got his pregnant Irish girlfriend to unwittingly attempt to take a bomb on to an El Al flight out of Heathrow. The airline’s security found it (the airport’s own checks did not). She was white. Kelvin McFilth would not have bothered stopping her. BANG.

And it gets worse, as Kel tells “Stopping law-abiding, non-violent white people at airports is a waste of time and an insult to everybody’s intelligence … The Dubai authorities should stop this nonsense now. They know who they are looking for. I am not one of them. And neither are you”. So there you have it - the Sun is a newspaper for whites only.

The Sun - it’s written for “you”. And it’s nothing to do with “them”.