Bullygate - Cole Clueless

The press has got its teeth well and truly into the saga of endemic bullying in the Tory Party - if only they had bothered about it before Elliott Johnson’s untimely death - and even the Sun has joined in, with the odious flannelled fool Henry Cole, formerly tame gofer to the perpetually thirsty Paul Staines at the Guido Fawkes blog, pretending to know all about it, without telling what everyone else already knew: he was big pals with Mark Clarke.

He does those too

So it is no surprise at all to see his latest piece for the paper - another alleged “exclusive” - make little mention of, er, Mark Clarke. Instead, he tried to shift the focus on to party co-chairman Andrew Feldman, because his sister did some work overseeing Clarke’s RoadTrip 2015 campaign. Sadly, CCHQ manages to dismiss the story in very few words indeed: “Deborah Feldman was not responsible for RoadTrip 2015”.

Even the Independent has managed to find a new angle: “David Cameron invited the so-called ‘Tatler Tory’ Mark Clarke to a tea party at his country retreat to celebrate the success of the now disgraced activist’s general election campaign project … The Independent has seen an invitation to the party at Chequers sent by the Prime Minister in July”. Is there nobody Master Cole can tap for a little information?

Recognise anyone?

Well, perhaps there is, as a scan though images from the 2008 Young Britons’ Foundation (YBF) annual party show. We see the flannelled fool with a familiar-looking young woman in one photo, while in another she and Mark Clarke are clearly enjoying one another’s company. Who she? Her name is Alexandra Swann, who has since jumped ship to UKIP only to return recently to the Tory fold.

She later commented on The Blue Guerilla’s post on the YBF party, claiming “I really want to make it clear that I spent about 5 minutes with Mark and despite what it looks like it as a seriously misleading photo”. Quite so. But they are clearly friends, and she and Master Cole know one another - so why doesn’t he give her a call and ask if she has a contribution for his next allegedly “exclusive” column?

This is not what it seems. So there

There were plenty of other people at that bash who would be worth a call, too. Far better to give the readers some real stories than the clueless attempts to pin it on Andrew Feldman. Perhaps Master Cole needs another name pitching? How about one Alister Cooling, who was not only there, but who then went on to become an aide to London’s increasingly occasional Mayor Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson.

After all, he’s got nothing to lose: Cooling was jailed in early 2012 for six months after admitting downloading child porn. As the Mirror told, “Alister Cooling, 27, who writes for the Conservative Home website and campaigned for London Mayor Boris Johnson, owned films featuring girls as young as five being abused”. Nice kind of people you get in the Tory Party, eh? But still better than asking readers to “look over there”.

Of course, this just leaves the field clear for Simon Walters at the Mail On Sunday, who won’t be fussed where he gets his information. Your choice, flannelled fool.