Toby Young Agrees With Himself

After the BBC News At Ten on Thursday evening, there was only one choice: to watch the remainder of Newsnight, or switch off. There was a very good reason for this: Question Time had, for some reason, invited the loathsome Toby Young to take part. There is only so much of the loathsome Tobes that one can stand without the possibility arising of serious damage being done to the TV as a result.

(c) Doc Hackenbush 2014

The self-styled Free Schools advocate and “classical Liberal”, a term which is nothing more than another way of telling the world that he is a right-winger who doesn’t have the bottle to own up to it directly, had journeyed to Glasgow, no doubt at the licence payer’s expense, to give viewers the dubious benefit of his superior insights on the issues raised by the audience, and one controversial topic in particular.

Tobes - just to show that the “classical Liberal” label is a crock of crap - has, by the most miraculous of coincidences, decided that Young Dave’s line on TV debates is absolutely right. When he Tweeted “I’m on @bbcquestiontime in Glasgow on Thursday with @RuthDavidsonMSP, @kdugdalemsp, @HumzaYousaf and @valmcdermid. What’s likely to come up?” he had his answer to that question well rehearsed.

Even his attempt to suggest everyone “look over there”, by snarking “Tune in to @bbcquestiontime to witness @HumzaYousaf's spectacular slip of the tongue at about the 20m mark, then suffer momentary brain fade” - it happens to all of us, Tobes, including your good self - could not disguise his grovelling acceptance of Young Dave’s brave and principled act of turning tail and running away.

He was, indeed, proud of backing Cameron’s shameless attempt to spin his way out of having to face Mil The Younger, as witness “This is me on @bbcquestiontime last night on why the TV debates are a sideshow”. Such a sideshow that he devoted an interminably long blog post to one of the 2010 debates (read it HERE), demonstrating once again that he is no more than another Dedicated Follower Of CCHQ.

And it gets worse for Tobes: a Twitter account called Campaign Watch then Tweeted out the same YouTube video with the caption “My view is the TV debates are a sideshow. One is enough”. Er, “my view”? Do we take it that Campaign Watch - which does give the impression of leaning just a little to the right - is a Tobes sock-puppet? That, to quote the old Monty Python expression, is in the “Oh what a giveaway” category.

Still, Tobes enjoyed himself, and for a short while won’t be campaigning for the Beeb to be abolished. He even had time to Tweet “Great crowd on #bbcqt yesterday. Nasty opponents warned me to stay away from Glasgow, but everyone I met was charming, funny and welcoming”. Of course they were, Tobes, they knew you were leaving town the next day. Or perhaps they saw the sock-puppeting exhibition as well.

Don’t let the door hit you on the way out, Tobes. Better luck next time.