Tories – Losing It In Rochester

When Young Dave urged Labour and Lib Dem supporters to lend him their votes to help hopeful candidate Kelly Tolhurst in the Rochester and Strood by-election, the air of desperation was palpable. But that was not the half of it: Cameron is now sounding yet more desperate, the Tory propaganda has ventured beyond parody, and it looks like the party Chairman has given up.

With the prospect of Nigel “Thirsty” Farage and his fellow saloon bar propper-uppers at UKIP winning next Thursday, Dave has now “said that victory for Ukip will create a ‘greater danger of insecurity and instability’ for the economy because it will make a Tory government less likely at the General Election”. But UKIP will just respond by telling that nothing from the Tories can be trusted.

But not this weekend

And they have plenty to cite: the Rt Hon Gideon George Oliver Osborne, heir to the seventeenth Baronet, pretending he’d got a 50% rebate on that EU budget adjustment, the claim that Dave could somehow persuade his fellow EU premiers to give up on freedom of movement, and Michael “Oiky” Gove fouling up over the European Arrest Warrant, all play into the Kippers’ hands.

All happened when Reckless was the MP

Cameron told the Telegraph that his party would be fighting to the last day in Rochester and Strood. But last weekend’s show by the Road Trip 2015 crowd, with not at all swivel-eyed Jeremy Hunt the star turn, does not appear set for a reprise today. Indeed, party chairman Grant “Spiv” Shapps’ normally busy and animated Twitter feed has been silent since Wednesday.

You cannot be serious

The boast of how many more local people are in work, and how many have seen a tax cut of some sort, looks silly: all this happened when Mark Reckless, who has jumped ship to UKIP, was the Tories’ MP, and the party was more than happy with him. Indeed, the most desperate campaign advert has been the personal attack on Reckless, with normally loyal Tory MPs wanting to distance themselves from it.

This attack advert sneers at Reckless for “studying politics at Oxford”. You read that right: just like Cameron did. Don’t vote for the candidate who studied politics at Oxford, vote for the party led by, er, a bloke who studied politics at Oxford. Paul Waugh of Politics Home, with restrained understatement, observed “Irony Alert”. Matthew Holehouse of the Tel went further.

“Views of Conservative MPs who were asked to deliver this range from ‘total crap’ to ‘f***ing stupid’”. That is someone from the most pro-Tory newspaper in the UK. And that is the reality: the Conservatives’ campaign is plumbing the depths of desperation, many MPs are refusing to go and campaign in Rochester and Strood, and even the party Chairman looks to have given up.

No thanks Dave, I don’t want to “look over there” at Labour. It’s you who is stuffed.