The obedient hackery of the legendarily foul mouthed Paul
Dacre today wants us to be jealous of the Royal Family, as it effortlessly
plays both sides of the field, telling that anyone not a monarchist “hated Britain” (pace Ralph Miliband) while poring over every item of clothing worn
by the Duchess of Cambridge in true why-oh-why style. This has now extended to
the Duke, and cars.
Bentley Motors, with the product on display
“Kate
and Wills' £250,000 bulletproof Bentley (top speed 200mph!) Duke and Duchess
will use saloon for official engagements” gasps the headline, as
readers are told “The Flying Spur has
Wi-Fi connection and nine-litre bottle cooler ... Costs £118 to fill engine
that manages 19 miles to the gallon”. There I was thinking that it was the
fuel tank that you filled up.
And, as the man said, there’s more: “news that Prince William has recently added a £250,000 Bentley to his
garages is likely to make him the envy of many fathers-to-be up and down the
country ... hand-crafted walnut interior, the champagne cooler and the wi-fi
internet capabilities are more luxuries than purely practical”. Yes, yes,
but there is some important information missing here.
“William and Kate are
also understood to have opted for quilted leather seats which heat up and have
a massage function ... Neither the car maker nor Kensington Palace were willing
to discuss how much the Cambridges’ deal is worth or whether they have been
given preferential rates. The cost is being met by the Duchy of Cornwall,
which funds the official work of Prince Charles and his family”.
All of which still
misses the most important point of the Royals opting for Bentleys, rather than
any other marque. Try again: “The
couple were given one of the first Flying Spurs off the production line, six
months before it was made available to the public”. Nearly there. Who makes Bentleys? That
would be “engineers at the firm’s
headquarters in Crewe”. Yes, it’s a North West success story.
And the Royal family is a key source of advertising: “A Bentley spokesman added: ‘As Warrant
Holders to HM The Queen and HRH The Prince of Wales, Bentley Motors are proud
to have supplied the Golden Jubilee Bentley State Limousine for use by The
Sovereign ... We supply current Bentleys for
use by a number of members of the Royal Family when the need arises’”.
But the Daily
Mail, far from cheering on a top British brand which employs thousands in
and around Crewe, and lauding the Royals as ambassadors for that brand, gets
all sniffy about the cost of filling the tank, the car’s specification, and
whether there’s a preferential leasing deal being done. Which was that paper
that kicked Ralph Miliband for dissing the Royals? Hey, it was the Daily Mail!
And they won’t cheer for British jobs either. It’s the paper that hated Britain.
Would now be a bad time to mention that some Flying Spur production is being moved to Dresden...
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