Dorries The Delusional

Although she has been evicted from the latest series of ITV reality show I’m A Celebrity Get Me Out Of Here, Tory MP for Mid Bedfordshire (yes, it’s her again) Nadine Dorries is still in Australia, and will be until early next month, as part of her commitments to the show. But this has not stopped her giving an exclusive to Rupe’s downmarket troops at the Super Soaraway Currant Bun.

And that interview gives every impression of showing that, whichever planet Ms Dorries is currently inhabiting, it isn’t the same one as her fellow MPs, and certainly not the one where Young Dave and his jolly good chaps live. “REBEL Tory Nadine Dorries last night vowed to use her I’m A Celebrity fame to topple PM David Cameron” begins the article, illustrating her restraint and modesty.

The piece then tells that the fragrant Nadine is nicknamed “Balls of Steel”, which she isn’t. Anyone of either sex considered “ballsy” doesn’t resort to smearing their Lib Dem opponent at a General Election as a “stalker” – a needlessly pejorative term that should be beneath an MP – or constantly engage in mean-spirited bad mouthing of their party leadership that has gone beyond making that “posh boys” point.

But Ms Dorries has got a way forward for her party, and that is to swap one posh boy for another: she is enamoured of the supposed talents of London’s occasional Mayor Alexander Boris de Pfeffel Johnson, believes that he is the saviour of the Parliamentary Tory Party, and that with him in 10 Downing Street, everything in the true blue garden will be wonderful – and highly popular.

Alongside this mildly optimistic set of assumptions is the frankly strange Dorries view of the current leadership: Cameron is alleged to use a “control mechanism” and “tamper” with the way MPs vote. Have I got news for Nadine – it’s called the Whips’ Office, and she’d have to live with it whoever was PM. And Bozza wouldn’t get her any nearer to lowering the 24 week limit on abortions.

One only has to look at the way that Johnson has discharged his mayoral duties – and his relationship with London’s only evening paper – to see that Bozza follows the money and the freebies, while keeping his pals sweet and not giving a toss about the rest. His appetite for vanity projects, if transferred to the national arena, would be utterly disastrous for his party, although maybe not for him personally.

This does not appear to trouble Nadine Dorries. It should do. She’d get no more of her agenda progressed under Bozza as she is doing now with Young Dave. She’d get none of that freedom she clearly believes Johnson would bring. And, as for the idea that “I can’t be de-selected” – don’t you believe it. Johnson would be if anything more ruthless than Cameron in order to get his way.

Anyone believing otherwise is simply delusional. Like Nadine Dorries.