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Saturday, 7 February 2015

Super Soaraway Poll Paranoia

Rupe’s downmarket troops at the Sun are currently battling against those who aren’t really out to get them on at least three fronts: the status and continued freedom from prosecution of Mazher Mahmood, aka the Fake Sheikh, is one, the recent change of presiding judge in the trial of four of the paper’s hacks another, and then there is the continuing realisation that they have inadvertently fuelled the rise of UKIP and now cannot stop it.
That's what I bladdy think of youse bladdy independent bladdy Labour Party, ya bladdy Pommie drongoes!

With the Fake Sheikh, everyone at Murdoch Towers is keeping schtum and letting as little information as possible get out. This may change as soon as the Met finally decides to bow to the inevitable and nick the SOB. There have been threats of judicial review over the change of judge, but ultimately they will just have to like it or lump it. And all they can do over the status of UKIP is to keep on trying to frighten the readers.

That last brings us to today’s Sun editorial, which has been proudly Tweeted out by David Jack, who is at the Times and totally independent of the Sun, just doing it of his own volition, honestly, and if you believe that, you’ll believe anything. Headed “UKIP Fantasy”, here is proof that the inmates of the News UK institution long ago hurtled through Barking, and have just overshot the buffer stops at Upminster.
BRITAIN may be heading for the most left-wing Government in memory - a hideous mash-up of Ed Miliband’s Labour and the Scottish Nationalists … The irony being that those chiefly responsible for bringing it about, UKIP voters, are those who will detest it most. A cobbled-together socialist Government couldn’t be more alien to Kippers’ wishes” it whines, not that the Sun wants to tell its readers how to vote, you understand.

And there’s more: “It will do nothing about immigration. There will be no referendum on Europe. It will be soft on benefits and tough on the businesses that create jobs. It will raise taxes immediately”. Oh just f*** right off. Why not say it’ll make every self-respecting bloke’s cock drop off? Tell the people straight that, under the rotten lefties, they will be prevented from using the Sun as an alternative wank mag.

The conclusion is equally lame: “millions of jobs, families, homes, pay packets and businesses will be at stake … The guinea pigs in a wild experiment by one socialist who’d like to remake the 1970s and another hell-bent on destroying the United Kingdom”. And to that I call bullshit. There is only one reason for this wibbling rant, and it is the dawning awareness that the Murdoch poodles cannot see Young Dave winning in May.

What they can see is a Government led by Mil The Younger, and this terrifies them, for one reason, and one alone. They have no leverage on Ed Miliband. They have Cameron where they want him. It was the same with Tone, Pa Broon, “Shagger” Major and Mrs T. Miliband will not pay homage at the court of Creepy Uncle Rupe. He will make his own decisions, and Murdoch will just have to like them or lump them.

Loss of power for the real meddling foreigners. That is what frightens Rupert Murdoch.

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